Giving Up Time
by Ayshen
Summary: One drunken question makes you wonder if it really is giving up time...or are you just givng up time you could be spending with the one you love. Alexis Davis has to make that choice. New or Old? Sonny Corinthos or Patrick Drake? COMPLETE.
1. Tequila Talking

**A/N: Well this idea has sorta been floating around my head for awhile...I don't know if I can do it but I am going to try. This is a sort of triangle/quadrangle story; I want to write it as believable as possible with the whole torn between two people angle...but I am a little biased with my Sexis; so be easy on me.**

**.Alright it is a year from now. Sonny is with Kate, and Alexis is starting to date Patrick Drake (with Robin's blessing of course) It all starts one night at a hospital fundraiser at the _Haunted Star. _**

**There will be shades of other couples...Cassio, CarJax, maybe Lusam, maybe Liason.**

**Anyway reviews and feedback are helpful..let me know if I should continue!**

Sonny walked into the hospital fundraiser with Kate on his arm. Lucy Coe had decided this year to attract the younger audience they would host a Vegas night. Luke had let them use the _Haunted Star_. Sonny assumed that Lucy had badgered him into it. His eyes started to scan the crowd until Kate tugged at his hand.

"Look there is Alexis, let's go say hi"

He followed and found Alexis standing near the roulette table. The black cocktail dress she wore was cut short and dipped low in the front. Before they reached her; Patrick Drake handed her a glass of wine and whispered something in her ear making her laugh. Sonny's brow furrowed...he knew that she had finally gotten rid of Jerry Jacks but this was a new development.

"Alexis, you look fabulous...those shoes" Kate exclaimed.

Alexis smiled turning the them, "well thank you for finding them for me...they really did go perfectly with the dress"

"Kate you know Patrick"

Patrick nodded, "Kate...Sonny" he said turning back to Alexis.

"I promised Lucy I would make an appearance to some investors"

"Don't be too long Doctor" she said flirting with him. He shot his dimples back at her before a goodbye to the other couple.

Kate piped in, "Which reminds me; I have to go find Jax; we have a couple mutual friends on the board"

Sonny nodded, "okay"

When she left Alexis turned to him, "Lucy outdid herself this year"

"Are you here with Patrick Drake? Robin's Patrick?"

She arched a skilled eyebrow at him, "you do know that Robin is pregnant with Nikolas' child; and they are engaged to be married...I would think that negates the whole 'Robin's Patrick'"

"Still isn't he a little"

"Handsome, successful, brilliant, funny do I need more adjectives?"

"How old is he?"

"Oh I know you aren't talking age because you have been known to dip into the PCU dating pool. Where shall I look for a date the geriatric ward? Or maybe Edward Quartermaine; do you think he is free?"

He sighed realizing he had this knack for digging a hole with her; part of it was real; him wondering what a women like Alexis saw in a little boy like Patrick Drake but the bigger part of it was him missing bantering with her.

"Come on, I didn't mean it like that. But Patrick Drake? I mean isn't a man your age more stimulating"

To that she smirked, "Not that it is any of your business but Patrick stimulates me just fine"

Before he could come up with a somewhat intelligent comeback said Doctor showed back up, "so can I steal my date back"

"Of course you can, steal away" Alexis responded her dimples matching his.

"See you later Sonny" she threw over her shoulder narrowing her eyes at him.

He stood there then turned to the bartender, "club soda with ice please"

Naturally his eyes scanned the crowd and found her again; he didn't know why it was bothering him so much. But the way the young doctor led her to the crap table his hand covering the small of her back, the way he leaned in closer to talk to her, or the way she smiled at him...it was getting under his skin.

"What are you looking at so intently?" a very pregnant Carly Jacks asked sitting down on the chair next to his.

Sonny turned to her, "what do you want Carly"

"Mineral water" she told the bartender ignoring Sonny.

"Well your date is schmoozing with my husband; so I thought I would keep you company...but you seem too busy watching the floor show. Oh and what do we have tonight; the doctor and the lawyer...how uninteresting. Although Alexis is more sane than I thought; she finally gave that freak show I call a brother in the law the boot and she is hooking up with Dr. Hottie"

When there was no response she waved her hand in front of his face, "hello earth to Sonny"

"Yeah"

Carly's eyes darkened, "are you jealous that Patrick is getting all cozy with Alexis???"

"Huh?"

"Oh my God, you so are"

Slowly he turned to her, "I am in a very committed relationship with a woman I adore"

She snorted, "yeah Diet Alexis"

"What?"

"Oh please did you not notice that Kate is like Alexis Lite? Hello the string of women after her...Reese, Kate...should I even mention Jordan? Even your freaking lawyer Diane is like watered down Alexis...it is kinda creepy"

A quick roll of the eyes and she laughed, "oh please roll your eyes now buddy, but go analyze your women choices" she said before patting her belly, "c'mon little one let's go find Daddy before Sonny makes Mommy's blood pressure run high"

Sonny watched her go and let the words sink in; she was wrong...just Carly shooting off her mouth like usual...until the words started to ring more truth than he cared to admit...and he ran through the Rolodex of women that had been since Alexis and suddenly some things were just too painful to bear.

"A scotch on the rocks" he ordered...he knew he shouldn't Lithium and alcohol didn't mix.

There was something about Carly's words swirling around in his head that he wanted to drown out. He took a drink of the scotch and his face soured. Damn Luke had the cheap stuff out. He looked out on the floor where Kate was having a conversation with Ned Ashton and he decided to go search out the good stuff.

"Have I told you that you look amazing tonight" Patrick asked leaning over her bare shoulder to whisper in her ear.

Alexis felt the familiar tingle on her skin...every reservation she had about making this date with Patrick was being slowly dissipated into the night air. Sure he was way too young, cocky, too much of play boy around town...but Alexis couldn't remember the last time she had smiled so much or felt so flirtatious .

"Quite the sweet talker, aren't we?" she offered back.

Patrick was having way too much of a good time. Sure he had been attracted to Alexis for awhile...smart, successful, independent, drop dead gorgeous women with legs to the sky...but she was turning out to be so much more than he could have imagined.

Before he could speak his pants started to vibrate.

"Your pants are ringing" she said playfully.

His dimples came out as he grabbed his pager, "the hospital...it looks like my cerebral edema is finally ready for surgery...I'm sorry I have to cut this night short"

"Duty calls Doctor"

Touching her hand he looked at her, "I hope we can continue this another night"

She shrugged, "you have my number"

He leaned down to kiss her on her cheek, "that I do"

Quickly he left the _Haunted Star_ and back to the hotel; before he was out the door Alexis felt a hand on her bare shoulder.

"Having fun?" came from her eldest daughter with a Cheshire grin on her face.

"Don't"

"What? Don't express how much fun you are having with a certain hunky doctor?"

That got a slight grin and a roll of the eyes, "small town gossip"

"Yeah take the code of silence...but I'm watching you...don't do anything I wouldn't do" she said before blowing a kiss to her mom.

Alexis rolled her eyes but smiled...now that she was dateless she decided to roam to the deck and take in the night air. Walking down a corridor she heard music coming from one of the rooms. She figured Luke had ran from the crowds to a safe haven. Instead she found Sonny sitting on the couch in on of the lower bunkers a bottle of Jose Cuervo in his hand and a phonograph playing a record.

The door shut behind her and she looked at him, "what are you doing in here"

He poured himself another shot, "why does music always sound better on a 33?"

"Are you okay?" she asked the guitar strumming in the background.

_**I don't know what they put in Cuervo that got me to say those things  
Usually I wouldn't care so much or make such a scene  
But seeing you there in that dress you were wearing just drove me right out of my head  
So don't hold me responsible for anything I might've said**_

_**(Tequila Talking – Lonestar)**_

Slowly he looked up from the record and he saw her standing there in that dress that made made her legs look miles long, and that collarbone he could remember kissing, the faint scene of gardenias flooding his senses.

"Why'd you give up on me?"


	2. Sorry

**AN...Thanks for all the positive feedback. Hope this chapter doesn't disappoint, and Merry Christmas and Happy Holiday's to everyone!**

_**Oh I had a lot to say  
Was thinking on my time away  
I missed you and things weren't the same  
'Cause everything inside it never comes out right  
And when I see you cry it makes me wanna die.**_

It took her a couple of seconds for the words to completely sink in...and it wasn't until she looked until those eyes that she knew what he was talking about.

"Why are you bringing this up now" she asked hoping she sounded more confident than she felt at the moment. The truth was the question made her ache.

He looked up at her his eyes boring into her, "We..us. You just gave up...you walked away"

She fought the tears back, "Is that how you remember it happening? Because I remember you telling me you were still in love with your wife."

"I loved Carly...I will always love Carly but what I felt for you was real"

Somehow this statement infuriated her and she seethed at him, "Real? As real as a one night stand, an affair, something that I knew had no future"

The words she was saying; his repeated back cut him like a knife. When he didn't respond she kept talking.

"It was us falling into bed one night; a night that never should have happened, right? A trivial one night stand with your lawyer"

"Don't call it that" he yelled.

Cooley she shot back, "why, you do"

His eyes were lit as she continued, "did you think I wouldn't hear? I mean Kate took sympathy on poor bitter Alexis. I loved you Sonny...this wasn't some game, or some rebound for me. I.Loved.You"

_**I'm sorry I'm bad, I'm sorry you're blue  
I'm sorry about all the things I said to you  
And I know I can't take it back  
I love how you kiss, I love all your sounds  
And baby the way you make my world go 'round  
And I just wanted to say I'm sorry. **_

"I LIED" he screamed back the emotions coursing through his veins.

"What?" she asked her voice dropping to an almost whisper.

The tone he recognized; it was her scared tone...the one she used when she felt like running away...when she felt like that little girl locked in the closet. This softened him; his first reaction was to reach out and touch her hands until he saw the visible flinch and the tears in her eyes.

"I lied Lex...to Carly, to Jason, to Kate...to myself...mostly because I didn't want to accept how much I hurt you...how much I screwed everything up"

She stared at him...part of her didn't want to believe him. But she had always been able to read him, God help her, and looking into his eyes she knew he was telling her the truth and it confused her beyond belief.

"Why, why are you saying this right now" 

Slowly he inched closer to her, "Because looking back at the last six years; I've been trying to replace the one person I should have never let go...why didn't you fight for me...for us"

"What was I supposed to do Sonny...throw myself at your legs and hold onto you?"

"Why didn't you tell me how you felt?"

Her eyes darkened, "I thought that night I told you everything...you knew who I was...you knew that night wasn't just some little game for me...you asked me to choose you, and that night I did. And then you threw me away"

_**Every single day I think about how we came all this way  
The sleepless nights and the tears you cried  
It's never too late to make it right  
Oh yeah sorry**_

_**(Sorry – Buckcherry)**_

The words make him wince, "I'm sorry" he said as simply and honestly as he could.

"Sonny"

"God, I've missed this...talking to you, just being around you" he said moving his hand to touch her cheek.

"Stop" she said weakly but made no real attempt to move his hand.

They stood like this for a couple short moments until she turned away from him to grab the door handle; her face still tingled where his hand had been.

His hands came to her bare arms; the hairs standing on edge and she shook the handle realizing it was stuck.

"Alexis" he said his low baritone voice elongating her name.

She sucked in a deep breath, "Stop...it's too late Sonny...just too late" she told him.

He could tell she was crying now; not even fighting the tears that were falling at her manicured toes.

"Mom" they both heard as the door clicked open.

"We have been looking for you everywhere" came from a smiling Sam with Lucky who frowned upon seeing the two.

Alexis took that opportunity to flee the room; running as fast as the heels would permit.

Sam turn to Sonny; pissed off, "what the hell did you do to her"

When that garnered no response she yelled at him, "You are such an asshole"

She stalked away and went after her mom with Lucky following after. He let his head fall into his hands. How was it that he screwed up every time.

Slowly he walked back up to the main deck feeling much more sober. "Sonny" he heard, "Sonny" came from Kate who was power walking towards him.

"Where were you?" she wondered.

"Just took a walk"

"Oh okay"

"Were you ready to go?"

She smiled quizzical, "sure"

"Alright, Max, bring the car around" he hollered at his body guard...wandering outside leaving Kate to follow. She didn't know what was wrong but the man she came with that night; didn't resemble the man she was leaving with.

Alexis slammed the door to the lake house thanking the sky above that Kristina and Molly were safely tucked in with Robin and Nikolas at Wyndamere. She kicked off her Jimmy Choo's and went straight for the wine. This night had spooked her, and she just didn't want to think about anything right now but a glass of wine, a warm bath and her soft comforter. She didn't want to replay Sonny's words, or feel the tingle of his skin on hers. She wouldn't...she couldn't.

The red light was blinking on her answering machine and she hit it. The first was from Sam.

"Mom, um...listen I'm worried about you. Give me a call"

The next one made her smile.

"I have three people here that want to say goodnight" Nikolas said, "four and a half" came from Robin in the background, "Okay four and a half" he said the smile in his voice, "here are the other three", Night An-Tee Lexieeee" came from Spencer", Goodnight Mommy, I love you" came from Krissy and then, "Nite nite mama" came from Molly and then Nikolas and Robin came back on, "Night Aunt Alexis"

The last one was a surprise, "Alexis Davis, this is Patrick Drake...I wanted to let you know I had a wonderful time tonight...but much, much too short. Now you have to let me make it up to you with dinner this week. I won't take no for an answer Miss Davis"

The tears came before she could hold them back. She didn't even know exactly why she was crying but she had a feeling this night had changed her.

Sonny woke the next morning before Kate, he showered, dressed and walked downstairs.

"Milo, can you pull the car around"

"Sure boss"

He left scratching a quick note to Kate on his desk.

"Where to boss?"

"Harborview Towers"

Alexis woke up on the couch; her head hurting. The bottle of Chardonnay lay empty on the table. Her once perfect dress was wrinkled beyond repair. She made it to her bedroom, washed the makeup off her face, brushed her hair and changed into a pair of lounge pants and fuzzy socks. She lie on her bed for a long while watching the rays of sun that came through her blinds and wondering at what exact turn she made did her life go wrong. When she finally got tired of thinking she wandered into the kitchen where the coffee maker was already percolating. She thanked God that Viola always set the automatic timer to brew in the morning.

She was well on her way to a second cup when the doorbell rang. Opening it was a man with a clipboard.

"Miss Davis?"

"Yes"

"Sign here please, these" he said pointing to a monstrosity of a bouquet "these are for you"

Scrawling her name she let him in to put on the coffee table, "let me grab you something"

He shook his head, "already taken care of, have a nice day"

Smiling as he walked out she opened the card,

_Alexis,_

_Last night was wonderful...how about dinner tomorrow at the Metro Court?_

_Patrick_

Bringing the card to her chest she sat down, the phone rang almost immediately.

"Hello"

"How'd you like the flowers?"

"You didn't have to"

"I wanted to"

"Okay, well they are beautiful"

"Good...and the dinner offer"

"Persistent, aren't we?"

His dimples caved in, "is that a yes?"

She sighed her heart pulling her in a million different directions.

"I mean if you don't want to...no hard feelings" he asked his ego a little bruised.

"Yes...I will have dinner with you tomorrow night"

Part of him was happy she couldn't see his reaction, the slow air pump he did, "great, is 7 okay?"

"Perfect, see you then"

"Yes, see you then" she said putting the phone on the receiver...she wasn't quite sure what she was doing but there was part of her that longed to jump right in, and she was going with it.


	3. I Miss My Friend

**A/N: Thanks for all the positive response! Hope you enjoy. I really want to make this a worthwhile triangle, I hope it translates.**

The black limo came to stop in the parking garage of the building, and Sonny stepped out. Milo went to follow and Sonny waved him off.

"Go get something to eat; I will call you when I'm ready"

"Boss, Uh"

"Now"

_**I miss my friend  
The one my heart and soul confided in  
The one I felt the safest with  
The one who knew just what to say to make me laugh again  
And let the light back in  
I miss my friend**_

Sonny pressed the elevator button and walked inside hitting the button for the Penthouse level. When the doors opened it was almost like being thrust into a world. He turned to PH2 and her looking flustered as she tried to work the jammed lock. Closing his eyes he could smile seeing her look at him the frustration lighting her eyes. His hand ran unconsciously over the handle; he never noticed the elevator ding.

"Sonny"

He turned and there was Elizabeth with Jake in one arm, and Cameron holding onto her hand.

"Jason's not here"

Squinting he smiled, "I know, I just…never mind. Have a good day"

Liz watched him walk across to the Penthouse across the hallway, "you too Sonny" she said quizzically before walking through the door.

_**I miss those times  
I miss those nights  
I even miss the silly fights  
The making up  
The morning talks  
And those late afternoon walks**_

Walking into the room of PH4 was weird. He hadn't been inside since Reese had lived there. He had kept the place furnished exactly how it had been six years ago. He had assumed it was out of comfort, but as he looked around he knew the real reason…it still felt like home. The home Stone had lived in…Robin…Brenda…and it was the place that made him feel closest to her. Where he could picture them sitting on the couch, him flirting mercilessly with her….her yelling at him, him kissing her.

_You're a great lawyer and a great friend. We can keep it that way, or we can just keep dancing indefinitely. All you got to do is walk out._

Slowly he made his way up the stairs. He didn't know why he was doing this to himself…but he continued to the bedroom. The black satin sheets were still on the bed…and as he closed his eyes; he could feel himself there in that moment.

"_Hey. You ok?" he asked climbing back into bed._

"_I'm okay"_

"_This is what you thought would wreck things between us?"_

"_Yeah"_

"_It's all going to be ok. Don't worry about it."_

The memory hit him like a ton of bricks…and he felt like the biggest ass. He had promised her…and he had let her down. The thought made him want to put his fist through a wall. She had chosen him that night…given in to her fears; showed him her heart…and he had acted so cavalier. There were some things that a person regrets for their whole lives…and Sonny would have to live with knowing he had the one person who brought him peace, and he had let her go.

_**I miss my friend  
The one my heart and soul confided in  
The one I felt the safest with**_

_**(I Miss My Friend – Darryl Worley)**_

**OoOoOoO**

She sat at her dressing table and held up the strand of pearls on one side and the diamond eternity pendant on the other. The dress she had chosen was a deep midnight blue silk, it skimmed her knees and came to a V low enough on her cleavage to be sexy, but high enough to be demure.

"The diamond one, with the silver matte Manolos" came from Sam standing in her doorway.

Alexis smiled, "What would I do without my fashionista. I didn't even hear you come in."

"Lucky and I scooped up the girls at Wyndamere, which by the way…Robin is going to pop soon. Right now they are still in the car listening to the last bit of Amelia Bedelia"

"Thank you so much for offering to baby-sit"

Sam grinned, "My mom is going out with a hot doctor; how could I refuse?"

"Stop" she said not quite being able to stifle the smile.

"I don't know; you two looked pretty cozy last night…speaking of, are you okay…you were pretty upset"

Was she okay? Really okay…did she not spend the day before in bed doing a little too much reminiscing about the past…about the way smiles came in droves, or the laughter that used to float down the hallways of the Harborview Towers. It wasn't something she let herself think about often…and the truth was she loved her life now. But those times she allowed herself to float down memory lane; it made her ache. Damn Sonny for awakening the dormant feelings.

"Sweetie, I'm fine…Sonny was just, we have a complicated history"

Sam just arched an eyebrow and decided to let it go; just then Kristina ran into the room.

"Mommy, you look beautiful"

Alexis' eyes lit up as she scooped her into her arms, "oh my girl, I've missed you"

"I missed you too Mommy. Spencer, Molly and I made you cards…but Spencer's and Molly's are messy because they are still toddlers" she said matter of fact.

"MOMMY!" Molly said coming in.

She put Kristina down and scooped her baby, "Eskimo kisses" she said as they rubbed noses together.

"Oh I've missed my girls, maybe I should"

"Don't even think about it…plus I am in need of sister bonding time" Sam said scooping Molly up and grabbing Kristina's hand.

"Come on guys, Lucky is baking chocolate chip cookies"

"Thank you Sam" Alexis called after them.

"Anytime mom"

Taking Sam's suggestion she threw on her silver shoes and grabbed the matching bag and ran out the door. There was a nervous excitement in the air for her tonight; it felt like a fresh start.

**OoOoOoO**

"Black or white?" Patrick asked holding up the two shirts in the General Hospital locker room.

Liz looked up from her catalog to Robin who was walking in, "Hey, so I have the best idea for the nursery's mural"

"Oh, do tell"

"I'm thinking the sea and-"

Patrick interrupted, "hello, shirt color"

Robin looked at him puzzled and Liz laughed, "he is going out with Alexis, oh second date, and he wants to know if he should go with the white shirt or black shirt"

"Mmm, white pizza sounds so good right now" Robin said rubbing her belly.

He looked at them exasperated and Liz almost fell off the bench laughing, Robin trying to hold it in, finally Patrick laughed too.

When the laughter subsided Robin looked, "black with the black blazer"

"I would kiss you right now, but I have a date" he said dimples ablaze.

"Have fun Patrick" Liz teased.

After he left they sat looking through baby catalogs, "is it weird, Patrick dating Alexis"

"I encouraged it"

"WHAT?"

Robin shrugged, "Patrick showed me I could love again…he is a great guy, just not my great guy…he deserves to be happy, as does Alexis"

"They were pretty cozy at the fundraiser last night" Liz teased.

She sighed, "now that I know Alexis better…she deserves a good time. I hope Patrick rocks her world"

"EWWW, TMI!!" Liz said as they exploded into laugher.

**OoOoOoO**

"Well I can pretty much guarantee Carly is not going to go for me being Godmother Jax" Alexis said to her best friend.

The blond Aussie shook his head, "I told her Jason can be Godfather if you could be Godmother"

She fought back the laugh when she felt the tap on her shoulder. Turning around her eyes rested on a pair of dimples.

"Alexis"

"Patrick"

Jax cleared his throat, "we will finish talking later…Patrick" he said nodding his head.

"You look gorgeous" he said smiling at her.

To that he got the dimples back, "you clean up rather nicely also Doctor"

Walking to the dining room; his hand fell comfortably on the small of her back…and neither could deny the slight surge in electricity.

Sonny sat at the table smiling while Kate bamboozled some magazine exec. There was something about watching a smart woman work that was a turn on. Halfway through his mineral water; he heard the strains of familiar laughter. Looking across the dining room; she sat in blue silk, her hand playing with the rim of her wine glass…Patrick's hand moving a piece of hair out of her face and it cut through him like a knife.

"So…now that dinner is done, how about you let me take you somewhere"

Her eyebrow arched and he kept flirting, "Scouts honor I will be on my best behavior"

"Well then doctor; lead the way"

Slowly he took her hand and led her from the dining room and she felt like maybe…this was finally the start of something good.


	4. Hands Down

**A/N: I heart Patrick and Alexis right now. They have so much potential. Anyway, hope you enjoy. Feedback is appreciated!**

"You brought me to the hospital?"

He didn't answer just smiled those damn dimples at her; what was it about dimples on a man that made her feel like she was 14 again.

"I am not going towards any supply closets with you; I've heard the rumors"

Patrick laughed at her ramblings, "don't worry counselor; I promised to be a perfect gentlemen tonight"

Taking her hand he got into the elevator and she continued, "you are not taking me to surgery or anything; I mean I believe you are brilliant...you removed part of my lung and I really don't need to see you in action"

_Breathe in for luck,  
breathe in so deep,  
this air is blessed,  
you share with me_

Finally the elevator halted and he intertwined his fingers leading her out. They walked down a hallway, around a corner, through a corridor until they came to an outside patio.

"What is this?" she asked looking around at the skyline.

Smiling, "this is the little known 15th floor terrace...and the perfect place to watch the movie that the Port Charles park puts up on the building...without the crowds, and with light refreshments" he said nodding to a love seat and table with the bottle of cider and a big bowl of popcorn.

Narrowing her eyes at him, "who told you?"

He shrugged, "for today's feature they are showing Splendor in the Grass" he said as she sat.

"Here is a blanket, and let me pour you some sparkling cider...I would have had wine but Epiphany would kill me" he said bustling around her.

"Impressive"

Grinning at her, " I just wanted to show you a good time...like you deserve"

"The movie is about to start" he said sitting down next to her.

_This night is wild,  
so calm and dull,  
these hearts they race,  
from self control _

Noticing the chill in the air she held up an end of the blanket, "want to share"

"I thought you'd never ask" he said cuddling close next to her which made her slightly nervous.

As the movie started; Alexis smiled his cologne flooding her senses...it had been a long time since she felt so...appreciated.

_Your legs are smooth,  
as they graze mine,  
we're doing fine,  
we're doing nothing at all _

During the movie she found herself naturally gravitating towards him...out of body warmth and comfort. As the movie ended his arms had found his way around her and she didn't protest. His pager went off and he groaned pulling apart.

"Crap!"

She smiled, "always on call?"

"A bus just came in...and they need me...I am so sorry"

"Duty calls Doctor...you get to work...I will catch a cab"

"I feel horrible"

"Don't" she said getting up as he followed her in to the elevator.

Pushing the "L" button they waited as the car made it's slow crawl down. When it opened they stepped out.

"Can I call you later?" he asked.

Nodding, "I would like that...thank you for an amazing night"

"Thank you"

_My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me.  
So won't you kill me, so I die happy._

They simply stared at each other for a moment and she leaned in placing a chaste kiss on his cheek, "see you later Doctor Drake" she said before sashaying back to the elevator.

He just watched her walk, his pulse speeding up until Epiphany interrupted, "c'mon lover boy...duty calls"

Turning to the nurse, "Epiphany, can I tell you how wonderful it is to see you this glorious evening?"

"Oh Lord"

Grabbing her hand he twirled her around and she swatted him, "boy get your pasty ass into scrubs before I break those pretty surgical fingers of yours"

Winking at her he went the way of the locker room and she shook her head with a slight smile...he sometimes annoyed her to no end but it was nice to see Patrick Drake with the kick back into his step.

Sonny at on his bed as the phone rang twice.

"Hello" came the bright voice on the other end.

Smiling, "hey Princess"

"DADDDDDDDDDDY!" she cried exuberantly.

"Whatcha doing pumpkin"

"Watching Little Mermaid"

He laughed, "again?"

"Lucky said if I won him in Go Fish I could pick any movie I want"

"Oh Lucky is there?"

"Uh huh, Sam is babysitting, and we made chocolate chip cookies, ate pizza, and played cards. Lucky and I wanted to play blackjack like you taught me, but Sam said mommy would kill her...so we played Go Fish"

"Where is Mommy" he asked nonchalant.

"On a date with Doctor Patty"

"Oh"

He heard something in the background as the tidbit of information sunk in.

"Krissy, who are you on the phone with"

"My Daddy" she said her voice laced with a bit of attitude.

Sam laughed in the background and Kristina turned her attention back to the phone, "I have to go Daddy; this is where Prince Eric fights Ursula"

"Okay Princess, I love you...and have a good night"

"I love you too Daddy" she said before he heard the phone click.

For a long while he just sat there feeling like an outsider...how did things become so messed up?

Alexis tiptoed into the house and Sam turned on the light right before she hit the hallway.

"Oh no, you are not getting off that easy"

Rolling her eyes, "well hello Samantha"

"Spill"

"Where's the popcorn"

She pulled a big bowl from behind her and Alexis sat on the couch, "bribery...so not fair"

"So"

Grabbing a handful and sighing, "why do I feel like I am 14 again?"

"That good?"

"Better" she said looking to her daughter, "I haven't felt like this in...a long time"

_Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember _

Patrick changed in the locker room after surgery; the pats on the back from his colleagues for a successful surgery. He was flying high as a kite.

"What's up with the grin, Dr. Feel Good?" Leo asked plopping down on the bench next to him.

"Great night"

Leo laughed, "would that have to do with another brilliant surgery...or a certain lady you were romancing on the terrace"

"What?"

"Oh please...you enlist the nurse's help and they were all swooning...I almost lost my lunch"

Ignoring him he kept dressing, "so come on, you aren't going to throw me a bone here...Alexis Davis; dude she is hot"

"And smart, sophisticated, interesting, engaging, should I go on?"

The doctor shook his head, "sounds like someone is falling for the DA"

_I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,  
the dim of the soft lights,  
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers  
and the time on the clock when we realized it's so late _

_(Dashboard Confessional – Hands Down)_

He shrugged, "it just finally feels like the start of something good"


	5. Ashes and Wine

**A/N: Can I tell you how much I am enjoying Sonny being the one having to watch Alexis be happy with someone else? It feels like poetic justice, lol. Anyway, hope you are enjoying too! Thanks for the reviews they keep me motivated!**

_**Don't know what to do anymore  
I've lost the only love worth fighting for  
I'll drown in my tear storming sea,  
That would show you, that would make you hurt like me **_

Sonny knocked on the lake house door. Even if he wouldn't admit it; he was slightly nervous. It had been three days since he had made the biggest ass of himself with her over the phone.

_Flashback_

"_How was your night?" he asked after the custom pleasantries._

"_Fine" she answered slightly confused by the questioning._

_Sitting down at his desk, "Kate and I were at the Metro Court last night; we saw you having dinner with the good doctor"_

"_That's nice" she said curtly._

"_But when I called Kristina she said you left her with Sam and Lucky"_

_Rolling her eyes, "yes I left Kristina and Molly with their older sister; you know the one they adore"_

"_I'm just saying it was kind of late"_

"_Okay, this conversation is over. First off, I am not your child; so don't you dare talk to me like one. Second, I don't get involved in your love life...so stay out of mine. If you have any issues with the parenting of our daughter; then I suggest you bring it up like an adult and not passive aggressively. Now I am going to hang up on you and if you call me back I am going to have the operator block your number" click is the last thing he heard_

He thought about sending Max to pick up Kristina but he had a feeling that wouldn't earn him any points. So he knocked on the door.

"DADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDY" he heard before little feet padding across the floor.

Instead of Kristina answering the door; she stood there her toffee and gold hair shining in the midday sun.

"Hey" he said almost sheepishly.

"Hi Daddy!"

"There's my Princess" he said scooping her into his arms.

Alexis smiled at the sight; and couldn't help the tingle it brought. Pushing it away, "do you have everything and your backpack"

Her eyes got wide, "I almost forgot Lamby" she said as he put her down to run off.

_**All the same  
I don't want mudslinging games  
It's such a shame  
To let you walk away**_

There was an awkward silence for a moment until Sonny cleared his throat, "I'm sorry about the other day; I was out of line"

Nodding, "yes you were, but I accept the apology"

Kristina then came bounding back out her Hannah Montana backup on her back.

"Bye Mommy" she said running up to kiss her.

"Ready Princess"

"Ready Daddy" she said taking his hand.

_**Is there a chance?  
A fragment of light at the end of the tunnel?  
A reason to fight?  
Is there a chance you may change your mind?  
Or are we ashes and wine? **_

Turning before they walked out the front door he smiled, "bye Alexis"

She couldn't help the natural smile that found it's home on her face, "bye Sonny"

Sitting down she flipped open a case file. Some left over string tying for Jerry Jacks. She wanted to get it done so that she could finally be rid of him. To think the year before she had been close to letting him get...too close. She acknowledge that her taste in men was somewhat flawed but Jerry had been the worst of the bunch. An hour later she was ready to send it with the courier in the morning; then her phone started vibrating.

"Alexis Davis"

"Please tell me you are hungry"

The butterflies started immediately and she mentally chastised herself for acting like a schoolgirl, "what did you have in mind?"

"There is this little Italian place on Fifth...I heard they had the best chicken marsala"

Her stomach grumbled, "well it just so happens that I am starving"

Patrick smiled his dimples caving in, "I am on my way from the hospital; should I pick you up"

"Okay" she said nervousness creeping in.

"Sounds good, I will be there in about a half an hour"

"See you then" she said hanging up.

Immediately she popped to her feet and ran towards the bedroom pulling out every pair of jeans she had. In the end she settled on the ones that were a pinch tighter then she usually wore; the ones Sam swore made her ass look fabulous. Then she pulled out a black blazer; immediately shaking her head and throwing it back in the closet. Sitting on her bed she flipped open her cell phone.

As soon as she heard a hello she rambled, "Patrick will be here in a half an hour to take me to late lunch/early dinner...what do I wear?"

"The dark blue True Religion jeans; the ones that make your ass look amazing...and the gauzy sleeveless aqua shirt; it will bring out the gold tones in your hair...and the square toe black boots with your black clutch"

"You're amazing"

Sam smiled, "it is who I am...have fun, and don't do anything I wouldn't do"

"Well that's a long list of"

Cutting her off, "bye mom, I love you"

Hanging up she grabbed the outfit sliding the jeans on appreciating the end result. After the shirt she dusted bronzer and blush, lip gloss, and three coats of mascara. Running the straightener over to smooth her hair she heard the knock on the door.

"Coming" she said walking through the hall making sure to check her appearance in every mirror.

Opening the door he stood there in a white button down, sleeves rolled up and a dark wash jean.

"You look amazing" he said his eyes running the length of her body and his dimples etching into his face.

"Why thank you Dr. Drake" she said as they stepped off the stairs.

He opened the door of his Porsche for her, "such a gentlemen" she teased.

After dinner they drove back by the lake, "you must have an amazing view" he said pulling up the drive.

"Why don't you come in and see for yourself" she asked feeling suddenly nervous.

Slowly they walked up to the house, she flicked on the desk lap and let him in.

"Now this is the great view" she said going out the patio door. He watched her face light up looking at the lights on the water.

"Sit down, would you like a glass of wine?" she asked.

"I would love one"

Taking a seat on the bench he couldn't help but smile; Alexis Davis was turning out to be so much more then he ever expected.

Coming out she held the wine bottle and two glasses, "admiring the view"

Looking at her intensely, "very much"

"Always the flirt" she said sitting next to him.

"This reminds me of this little village in Spain; the light shines off the water and it looks like a million crystals shimmering in the dark"

"When were you in Spain" she asked angling her body towards his.

His eyes crinkled reminiscing, "I was on a racing circuit"

"Racing"

"Stock cars"

She took a sip of her wine, "Patrick Drake, world renowned neurosurgeon by day, race car driver by night?

Laughing, "I was in college...I didn't want to live in my father's shadow...but as much as I loved racing cars...being a doctor was in my blood"

"I understand"

"Did you always want to be a lawyer?"

Smiling, "back in Greece I would practically devour law books, ethics, philosophy...when I came to America for boarding school I knew I wanted to go to Harvard and study law"

Looking at her their eyes connected and she saw it before it happened. He tilted slightly setting his wine glass down...then leaned in...she had a chance to stop it; instead she put her glass down and met him halfway. His lips touched hers tentatively at first, meeting in a slow tango...when he felt her hand come to his bicep he scooted closer and let his tongue part her lips. It was sweet; she tasted like wine...intoxicating him. Hands softly cupped her cheeks and then roamed through her hair...it was soft, velvety, her lips and tongue feeling like satin. They only broke apart when the loud buzzing of her cell phone on the glass table would not stop.

"Alexis Davis" she answered out of breath.

"What...oh my God...I'll be right there"

Turning to him despair written in her eyes, "the hospital...it's Robin"

They didn't have time to think about what the kiss meant; because in a flash they were running through the emergency room doors at General Hospital.

His eyes came to hers first and she ran to him, "what's wrong?"

"Her water broke...they are doing an emergency c-section to get the babies out" he said his voice wracked with emotion.

"She had a scheduled c-section for next week; this wasn't" she said her hand coming to her mouth.

_**Don't know if our fate's already sealed  
This day's spinning surface on a wheel  
I'm ill with the thought of your kiss  
Coffee laced intoxicating on her lips**_

Sonny did what felt normal and took her into his arms; her head resting on his shoulder as she fought back the torrent of tears.

Patrick watched Sonny holding Alexis and he ran off seeking anyone who could give him useful information. Robin wasn't just a colleague; she was a great friend...someone who had shown him what love was.

Alexis sat on the cold plastic chair watching Sonny pace, "she's going to be okay...Robin is strong, she's a fighter"

Nodding, "Stone wouldn't let anything happen to her...but I could kick myself...I broke my promise. I promised him I would watch out for her, protect her...how did things get so messed up?" he asked.

"Hey, that's the past...Robin forgave you...you forgave her. I know you guys have been close again; don't beat yourself up"

Smiling sadly; he wondered how she did that; made him instantly calm.

_**Shut it out  
I've got no claim on you now  
Not allowed to wear your freedom down**_

"Alexis" he heard a voice call and he turned in time to see Patrick coming towards her. The look on her face when she saw the young doctor cut him...she looked happy.

"She is still in surgery...they couldn't really give me any more info"

"Thank you" she said smiling at him.

He took her hand in his, "I'm going to see if I can find out anything else, okay"

"Okay"

Jogging off she sighed deeply; everything had to be okay.

Half an hour later the OR doors swung wide open and Nikolas pulled off the surgical mask, "she's okay; they are okay"

Alexis fought back the tears of joy as she embraced Nikolas, "I have to go back in...but I knew you guys would want to know...thank you for coming" he said nodding to Sonny.

She practically jumped into his arms, "they are okay...see, everything is going to be okay"

Deep inside he wondered what okay was.

As Sonny went outside to make calls Sam and Lucky came running through, "we came as soon as we could is everything?"

"Nikolas came out and said they were fine...that's all the news we have"

Patrick sauntered up smiling, "Baby Boy Cassadine was born exactly 7 minutes before his little sister; both are doing fine as is their mom"

Everyone beamed at the news and Alexis looked at him, "thank you" she said touching his hand gently.

Sonny stood at the entrance to the lobby; knowing exactly what being on the outside looking in felt like to be on the outside looking in.

_**I'll tear myself away  
That is what you need  
There is nothing left to say  
But**_

Is there a chance?  
A fragment of light at the end of the tunnel?  
A reason to fight?  
Is there a chance you may change your mind?  
Or are we ashes and wine?  
The day's still ashes and wine  
Or are we ashes? 

_**(Ashes and Wine – A Fine Frenzy)**_


	6. The Reason

Alexis sat in the rocking chair next to the bed little Catelyn Mackenna Lauren Cassadine tucked safely in her arms

**A/N: Sorry it took so long…hope you enjoy. My Paxis fans…don't be too alarmed. I promised a triangle and hope this is living up to expectations! Thanks for all your reviews. Keep 'em coming!**

Alexis sat in the rocking chair next to the bed little Catelyn Mackenna Lauren Cassadine tucked safely in her arms. Robin lie in the hospital bed Stefan Mikhail Nikolosovich Cassadine sleeping comfortably in the crook of her arm. Spencer sat on Nikolas' lap and babbled to his new brother. When Lesley and Bobbie came later she handed over the baby, kissed Robin and Nikolas and realized how exhausted she was.

Walking out of the room she nearly ran into Sonny.

"How are they doing?" he asked worried.

She smiled ragged, "The babies are healthy and gorgeous both with mouthful names, and their mother feels like she was hit by a truck and somehow is still glowing"

"Good" he said smiling.

"Now you…you look exhausted. I hope-"

Cutting him off, "I am going home right now and crawling in my bed to sleep for at least three days"

Laughing, "good"

"Now go see Robin before those orchids wilt"

"Alright counselor, I'm going"

_**I'm not a perfect person  
There's many things I wish I didn't do  
But I continue learning  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know**_

He watched until she disappeared into an elevator offering a slight wave and smile.

Stopping at the lobby level she decided to walk by the nurse's desk and stop to see how Epiphany was doing. During her fight against cancer the nurse had become a confidante.

While she was making conversation she felt eyes on her and spun around to see a certain tall doctor smiling at her.

"So I may have to talk to Robin about having any more kids"

"Huh?"

"I mean she goes and has twins and I don't get to see you all week"

Cheeks flushing crimson she laughed at him, "you just inherited the flirt gene, didn't you?"

"You can blame my father"

"I might just do that" she teased.

Waving bye to Epiphany she started down the hallway with him.

Walking her to the elevator he punched the down key, "so…can I maybe see you later?"

Looking at him she was tempted to say no…tempted to turn from whatever was developing between them but she found herself doing the opposite, "I think I would like that"

He smiled those intoxicating dimples, "I get off at 9:00; I just have to get home and change"

"How about I meet you at your place around ten and we go from there?"

The elevator dinged open, "sounds great"

Sonny Corinthos lingered outside the hospital door not wanting to interrupt. He choked back emotion looking at his self proclaimed little sister holding her babies. His mind immediately went back to Stone and it made him ache inside. How had he changed so much from that man…the man Stone was proud to call his brother? Mac interrupted his thoughts.

_**I'm sorry that I hurt you  
It's something I must live with everyday  
And all the pain I put you through  
I wish that I could take it all away  
And be the one who catches all your tears  
That's why I need you to hear**_

"She's been waiting for you"

Turning to the man who had been more of foe then friend Sonny smiled, "I just can't believe it"

"Me either"

Nodding he knocked on the door and heard them invite him in.

Robin beamed seeing his face, "there you are"

Nikolas even smiled as he turned to Robin, "I'm going to go make a couple of calls, okay"

"Yeah" she said as he leaned in to kiss her forehead.

Sonny watched him leave and then came to her bedside, "Wow, I'm…"

"Me too" she said tears welling up in her eyes.

"Catelyn and Stefan"

"He's watching down over us right now…smiling"

Robin smiled brightly, "I know"

"So how are you feeling?"

"Great and horrible at the same time"

_**I'm not a perfect person  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know**_

His dimples came out, "I am so happy for you Robin…and I am so glad I can share this with you…I'm so sorry for"

She interrupted, "no…no apologies…everything is exactly the way it was meant to be"

One of the babies started to whimper and Sonny leaned in, "can I?"

"Of course…Catelyn…meet Uncle Sonny"

Holding that little baby in his arms…it made him think of fresh starts…new beginnings…becoming again the man Stone was proud to call his brother…and that hopefully Stone's namesake would proud to call him Uncle.

Alexis grabbed the keys from the bureau and took one last glance in the mirror. Tossing her bangs a little she left walked out of the lake house. Driving across town she finally pulled up to the looming apartment building and parked. The doormen held the door and ordered the elevator up to 12C. Immediately after she exited the elevator she wondered if he had mistaken the number. There was a loud ruckus seemingly spilling out from under the cherry wood door. Pulling out her phone she scrolled down to Patrick's number but before it could begin ringing the door swung open.

"Dang Miss Davis, you look hot" Cassius announced almost running into her.

Smiling tersely, "thank you"

Patrick walked to the door looking sheepish, "I'm sorry, I got out early and the guys wanted to see my track…and five minutes and I will have them kicked out"

She followed him in noticing Leo, Ian and Andy gathered around a toy race track, yelling.

"Guys, you gotta…oh dude, Andy…push it…faster" Patrick said at first trying to shoo them and then getting caught up in the game.

Touching his arm, "listen…have fun with your friends…we'll do this another night"

His gaze shifted to her and looked like he wanted to kick himself, "No, listen I"

"It's okay" she said offering a smile.

Walking her out to the elevator he felt like a dupe, "can I call you tomorrow?"

"Sure" she said before he leaned in to kiss her cheek.

As she walked out of the building she flipped her phone open, "twenty minutes…Metro Court bar"

Diane was already working on a martini when she joined her, "I thought you had a date to play doctor?"

"Doctor was busy playing race track with his friends…a martini, dirty" she said to Diane and then the bartender.

"God, I didn't really realize how young he was until I saw him with his friends playing with remote controlled cars…remote controlled cars" she said exasperated.

"You act like you never play with toys" Diane teased.

Alexis feigned shock, "Objection counselor"

"Overruled"

They laughed and drank until they heard a familiar voice, "well look two lovely ladies for the price of one"

"Mineral water please" he said to the bartender.

Turning to him Diane asked dryly, "shouldn't you be at home with the wonderful Ms. Howard"

He gave her the look, "do I have to give Max another night off so you stay out of my personal life?"

"Touchy, touchy"

"Unfortunately not for me" Alexis said downing her second martini.

"Huh?"

Diane laughed, "Seems Miss Davis was looking for Dr. Feel Good to give her a physical but he is too busy playing with his wittle friends"

Alexis threw a napkin at her, "see the next time I call you for comfort"

Sonny chuckled, "come on, I will take you home"

"In your dreams" Diane said causing Alexis to break into a fit of giggles.

He shook his head, "okay I will drop you off at your house"

"Where does my chariot await?" she asked already walking out to the car.

Throwing down money on the bar Sonny offered his hand to Alexis, "you too"

"Thanks Dad"

After dropping Diane off they rode in silence in the back of the limo.

"What's wrong?" she asked studying his face.

"Nothing" he said trying to flash the dimples.

Looking at him intently, "bull"

Glancing away before he turned his head back, "Kate and I broke up"

"Oh I'm sorry"

"I'm not"

"What?"

"I've been needing to make some changes Alexis…I don't like who I've become…and for my kids and everyone I love" he said their gazes locked, "I need too"

It took her breath away, the look in his eyes…the intenseness of his gaze…she hadn't notice the car stopping until Milo opened her door the fresh breeze hitting her face.

"Thank you Sonny" she managed to stutter out.

"No thank you"

_**I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
and the reason is you**_

_**(The Reason – Hoobastank)**_


	7. Falling For You

**A/N: Thanks for being so patient with me…I think my muse is sneaking out. I hope you enjoy this chapter…I actually had a lot of fun writing it…and am actually more excited about the next chappie!**

_Because tonight will be the night  
that I will fall for you_

He knew that he had messed up…two days later and she hadn't returned any of his two voicemails. Granted he knew she was tied up with a case right now…but it just seemed off. He must have looked about ten years old playing race cars with his friends…he already knew the misgivings she had about his age…and he just reiterated it. If he were physically able to, he would kick himself in the ass.

So when he saw Samantha McCall exit the elevator he decided to become proactive about his life.

"Sam" he called.

She turned and smiled, "hey Patrick"

"Hey how are you" he asked an impatience in his voice making Sam smile.

Deciding to tease him she played along, "I'm good. I got a job at the Haunted Star, Lucky and I are doing smashingly…I also decided to take some night PCU; you know work on that law degree. Right now I am here to visit my two second cousins, have you seen them, they are adorable" she rambled on.

After she felt like she had tortured him enough she smiled and patronizingly asked him, "and how are you, Dr. Drake?"

"Are you torturing me on purpose?" he asked his eyes wide open.

Holding her thump and forefinger about an inch apart she smiled, "just a little"

He sighed and she continued, "so how is that race track Patty boy?"

"_She told you_," he asked before mock slamming his head into the wall.

"No, I heard her talking to Diane about it over the phone"

Groaning, "she told Diane, great"

"I never thought I would see the day, the great and powerful Dr. Drake freaking out like a girl…chill out man, it's not the end of the world"

"Thanks for the pep talk, I have to finish my rounds, I am almost off," he answered his tone clipped.

Grinning she waited until he was halfway down the hall before yelling, "So you don't want to know that she is working from home today and that in about an hour she want a double shot, no foam, latte…you know just saying" she said winking.

That garnered a big grin; "I could kiss you right now!"

"Yeah, let's announce that for the whole hospital to hear" she said smiling and rolling her eyes and walking towards her intended destination.

**OOoOoOoOoOo**

_The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting  
could it be that we have been this way before_

The knock on the door was responded to by one exuberant eight year old tearing down the hallway, "DADDDDDDDY!" Kristina yelled

Alexis looked at her watch as she opened the door, "is it three o'clock already?" she asked muttering to herself as Sonny let himself in.

"You're working too hard counselor," he teased as his daughter jumped into his arms.

"Hey Princess" he said kissing her forehead.

Alexis leaned in to give their daughter a kiss goodbye and her scent assaulted his senses.

"Bye sweetie, have fun with Daddy"

Sonny smiled, "why don't you come with us…picnic lunch on the boat?"

Sucking her lip in between her teeth she thought about how tempting the offer was. A day on the lake with her beautiful daughter…and with Sonny, the Sonny she was remembering more and more lately. Then she looked to the pile of briefs and sighed a breath of relief almost thankful she had an excuse not to.

"Unfortunately I can't, I have hours or work to do…so go, have fun"

He smiled noticing her deflection, "next time," he said with a wink.

After they left she sat down, closed her eyes for a moment and let her mind wander. She always stopped herself…there was no need to give in to any unrealistic fantasies. An hour into her research she could feel a headache coming along…she needed a pick me up, badly. Just as she got up to attempt to make coffee there was a knock on the door.

When she swung it open she was surprised to see him.

"Double shot, no foam latte?" he asked giving her those dimples.

She smiled a little sheepish. She had ignored him for days…and here he was on her doorstep with coffee…and dimples.

"You brought me coffee"

A quick nod, "Sam was at the hospital and maybe mentioned your favorite drink"

Eyes narrowed, her daughter was trying to play matchmaker…although if she were honest she would admit that she was, maybe, just a little…happy to see him.

"Thank you…would you like to come in," she asked.

_Oh, But hold your breathe  
Because tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true_

Walking in he turned back to her, "listen, I think we need to talk"

Nodding she led him over to the couch, "okay"

"So the whole race track thing…kind of freaked you out?" he asked sitting down.

"It did not _freak_ me out…it just made me realize how different we are…Patrick, you are a lot younger then I am…you like to hang out with your friends and play with your race track; there is nothing wrong with that…I am just at a different place in my life…and I just don't know if we are compatible"

_Because a girl like you is impossible to find  
It's impossible  
So breathe in so deep  
Breathe me in  
I'm yours to keep  
And hold on to your words  
Cause talk is cheap  
And remember me tonight  
When you're asleep_

He didn't speak at first…simply looked at her with that determined gaze, "I know that I care about you Alexis…I know that you are brilliant, witty, smart and sexy as hell…and frankly I don't want to give you up without a fight. Age is nothing but a number…and numbers don't bother me; I hope that you won't let them bother you…and yeah this could all go to hell…but shouldn't we give it a chance?"

The way he looked at her made her want to but she still had reservations, "I have kids Patrick…all the kids I want in this lifetime…I have a daughter who is about the same age as you," she said getting up and rambling and talking with her hands.

Instead of speaking he stood up and caught her hands mid air and gently pushed them down to her sides…then he moved in for the kiss, his palm touching her cheek at first, their mouths touching, his tongue parting her lips, his hand gently winding in her hair…and when he broke apart she looked at him wide eyed.

"So, what do you say?" he asked his face directly in front of hers.

Her lips came to his before she pulled back and smiled, "so are you going to teach me how to play with your race cars?"

Dimples ablaze, "anytime"

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

Sonny watched Kristina run across the desk of the boat. Sometimes it amazed him how much she looked like Alexis. He couldn't believe that something so great and amazing came from him…that Alexis had given him this gift. He knew that he didn't deserve it…. was no where near worthy of this little girl's amazing love, he was even fit to break her mama's name…but that didn't take away that he wanted them…that he would fight his way back to them…to become the man that they would be honored to have in their lives.

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

_Because tonight will be the night  
That I will fall for you  
Over again  
Don't make me change my mind  
Or I won't live to see another day  
I swear it's true  
Because a girl like you is impossible to find_

_(Fall for you – Secondhand Serenade)_

Patrick's lips trailed over her collarbone, up her neck before his mouth suckled her earlobe. Her she was, Alexis Davis, mother of three, district attorney, Cassadine making out like a teenager…and it felt great.

His hand touched the bare skin of her stomach and slowly slid up the crisp white shirt eliciting a deep sigh. His nimble fingers played with the clasp in the middle of her bra and just as he moved to unsnap his leg vibrated harshly against her thigh.

"Ahh" she yelped before realizing what it was then smiled, "I think you are vibrating"

_In more ways then one_, he thought pulling out the phone, "Dr. Drake"

Alexis watched his face turn ashen, "yeah, okay…I will be right there"

He turned to her a look of despair on his face, "that was the hospital…there has been an accident," he said.

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

Sonny smiled as Kristina piled a scoop of vanilla and chocolate over her caramel fudge brownie in the kitchen of Kelly's. He watched as his father doted on the little girl. She was special that way…everyone she came in contact with was touched by her.

His phone began to ring and he flipped it open, "Milo, where the hell is your brother?" he asked expecting Max to have picked up Michael at school and dropped him off at Kelly's.

"Mr. C…. there's been an accident"


	8. Broken

**A/N: So sorry for the wait. Warning…I would rate this PG-13. Reviews are love!**

Fourteen minutes, thirty-six seconds, thirty-seven, thirty-eight, each one dragged more then the last. The elevator dinged for the fourth time and she looked up slowly her eyes meeting Carly's and her heart broke.

"What happened, where's Michael, where's my son" Carly asked her hands trembling.

Alexis placed her hands over the other women's and tried to find her words, "Patrick is in there with him…there was an accident…a car, Max was driving him home from school"

"Oh God…oh God…my baby" Carly cried out, the sob choking in her throat.

"Carly, come on…you have to breathe, shhh, sit down"

The women in front of started to take deep breaths with her coaxing, "Good, good, just like that" she said leading her over to one of the chairs. It took everything in her not to break down…not yet, not when people needed her to be strong.

Bobbie came running through the doors seconds later, "Mama," Carly cried as Alexis stepped out of the way.

Rubbing her hands over her face she tried to quell the dull ache in her stomach…it was no use especially when the door burst open.

Toffee colored eye met chocolate colored and he saw the answers to his questions.

"Lex" he whimpered.

She came to him slowly; her hands touching his cheeks, her eyes staring into his…almost as if to will him to be strong…to give her strength as his own. The pain burnt at her insides.

"He's in surgery…he's a strong boy Sonny…a fighter, okay…just like his daddy"

Gulping back the sob he tried to pull himself together, "Kristina is with…with Mike, he called Viola, she is going to come pick her up"

"Okay, okay, that's good" she told him nodding her hands still cupping his face.

"Sonny" she heard Carly whisper behind her.

Stepping out of the way she saw him crack, "Car" he said grasping her in a tight hold.

Alexis felt the emotion slipping from her; looking towards the ceiling she tried to blink black the tears.

Jason burst through the door moments later; the frenzied look on his face cracking what was left of her resolve.

The tears fell in a steady flow as Sonny found his way back to her side…they sat in the hard plastic chairs finding strength in just being close to each other.

Epiphany walked in an hour later, "Pat-, Dr. Drake was able to stop the brain bleed…but Michael is still in critical condition…we are monitoring his vitals, and we will know more after the tests come back" she managed to get out hoping she could mask the emotion in her own voice. Cases didn't usually get to her…but this one; it had…and every time she looked at Michael on that table, she could see her Stanford.

Silence fell over the room. Alexis found her fingers intertwining with Sonny's, Jason and Carly clung to each other, and Bobbie sat there an eerie stillness over her.

She couldn't have told you how long they sat there, silent…waiting. The lids of her eyes were heavy, her body weak, every nerve felt exposed. Sonny seemed to pick up on the tension radiating from her.

"Hey, you look exhausted…you should go home" he said his eyes still locked on the doors in front of him.

"No Son-"

Cutting her off, "Alexis, please…go home, kiss Kristina for me, let her know her daddy loves her" he said turning to her the infinite sadness in his eyes making her ache all over.

"Call me, as soon as you hear something, okay?"

He gave her a pained smile and nod. She didn't look back because she knew if she had that it would have been impossible to leave his side…and as selfish as she felt the only thing she wanted was to go home and hug her daughters.

OoOoOoOoOoO

He hadn't needed to see the results; he was good enough surgeon to know. To know that he failed a child…sure the surgery was textbook…he had done everything right, and yet it still wasn't enough. The pain swelled in his chest and he wanted nothing more then to have a drink…to crawl into a bottle and never back out. It was moments like this that scared him the most…where he could look into the future and see him reliving the sins of the father.

On his way to Jake's he made a detour.

**OoOoOoOoOoO**

The last kiss fell onto Kristina's mocha tinged skin…she felt guilty for being slightly relieved the girl's were already in bed when she came home. She couldn't imagine having to explain to Kristina why daddy ran off during their visit…or why Michael never showed up for ice cream. The very thought of it made the dull throb come back to life in the pit of her stomach and the pain started to consume her.

Pouring herself a glass of wine she hoped to quell some of the anxiety. The knock on the door startled her. She wasn't quite expecting the brown eyes on the other side…. or the lost look in them.

_The broken clock is a comfort, it helps me sleep tonight  
Maybe it can stop tomorrow from stealing all my time  
I am here still waiting though i still have my doubts  
I am damaged at best, like you've already figured out_

"Hey" he whispered his voice filled with hoarse emotion.

"Are you okay?"

He shrugged and attempted a pained smile, "yeah, I just wanted to see you"

She knew he was lying, knew that it was taking everything inside of him not to show the cracks to her.

"Come in"

Running his hands through his hair, "you know when you take the Hippocratic oath you think, this is it…I am a doctor, I am going to save lives…what you don't realize is how often you do everything humanly possible and it's still not enough" he said the emotion lacing every syllable.

Watching him was like someone cutting small flesh wounds in your skin…not enough to really do any damage but enough just enough to cause you an excruciating amount of pain.

_I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing  
With a broken heart that's still beating  
In the pain, there is healing  
In your name I find meaning  
So I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on, I'm holdin' on  
I'm barely holdin' on to you_

Her hand touched his arm softly, his hand coming over her own and gently pulling her to him. His face was buried in her shoulder and the sweet smell of her skin invaded his senses, coming over him and soothing the pain.

_The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head  
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead  
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes  
That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life_

Having her so close to him, their hearts beating against each other…he had never felt this close to another person…and it made him long for her.

Hands rubbed his back, her voice above a whisper lulling him. His head came up, his eyes searching hers.

There were certain moments in her life when Alexis knew she could either run or stay and let something happen…something she wasn't trying to control. Looking into Patrick's puppy dog brown eyes she knew this was one of them.

His lips touched hers very tentative at first, almost asking permission. Her

arms came around him in silent acceptance.

_I'm falling apart, I'm barely breathing  
with a broken heart that's still beating  
In the pain (in the pain), is there healing  
In your name (in your name) I find meaning  
So I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin'), I'm holdin' on (I'm still holdin')  
I'm barely holdin' on to you_

Kisses deepened, tongues danced until she pulled away breathless.

"Patrick what are we" she asked trailing off.

A sad smile came to his face, the pain in his eyes very much alive, "I need you" he admitted.

Millions of thoughts ran through her head; most telling her to run…but she had run too much in her life…and it was too exhausting.

_I'm hangin' on another day  
Just to see what you throw my way  
And I'm hanging on to the words you say  
You said that I will be OK_

Taking his hand she silently led him down the hall to her bedroom. She had never let any man in there after Ric; never allowed someone to get that close again.

Turning to him, his eyes glowed like embers with a mix of intense pain, longing…desire.

Slowly he came so close to her, so close, and she tried to breathe, but her mind was in so many different places it seemed her brain wasn't sure of the signals to send.

Her fingers came to his shirt, popping each button open slowly, her heart speeding up with every new inch of exposed skin.

Nimble surgeon fingers tangled in a strand of her hair as he watched her finding everything about her achingly intoxicating.

When she came to the last button she admired the tanned muscular chest and quickly moved her lips to touch it. Heat radiated, burning her lips with desire.

A moan came from him as she peppered loving kisses down his stomach moving lower. Her fingers slowly pulled the buckle on his belt open before popping the button on his slacks, slowly sliding the zipper down.

He ached for her, every touch closer to driving him over the edge. He pulled her back up to him, his eyes seeking hers before he leaned in…his tongue beginning to caress her inner ear, the hot breath causing goose bumps to come alive down her back.

His hands touched at the skin between her pants and shirt first before slowly moving up her torso.

"I need you, I need you _now_" she whispered the trepidation in her voice filled with a wanton lust.

Smiling he pulled her close and then backed them to her bed. He sat her down before him, and then ridded his body of the rest of his clothing.

Naked he was before her…physically and emotionally.

She touched him and he stripped off her shirt reveling in the swell of her breasts under the black lace bra. He came to his knees his mouth tracing the delicate curve of her collarbone as he unlatched the bra letting her spill out into his hands.

The touches on her skin drove her crazy and she fell back from the intensity of it all. His hands came down her sides to the sides of her lounge pants. He pulled them over slowly, his mouth following down her long legs. When she was finally rid of them he moved back up doing the same with the lacy black boy shorts.

"You're beautiful" he said his eyes drinking her naked body in.

A nervous smile came to her face, "you're not so bad yourself"

Slowly he brought himself to her, his mouth crashing upon hers as their bodies became one.

_The broken lights on the freeway left me here alone  
I may have lost my way now, haven't forgotten my way home_

_(Broken – Lifehouse)_


	9. Make Up Your Mind

Sunlight broke through the trees and filtered through the blinds. He had been awake for an hour, content with holding her body against his. It helped to keep him from thinking too much…from remembering that shock of red hair, the ache of failure crawling up and festering at his bones.

He closed his eyes and inhaled the scent of her hair, it was something lightly floral, and it made him close his eyes and be able to think about something other then a little boy who wouldn't be waking up.

She felt the strong arm wrapped around her and the night before came back, her eyes fluttered open and she studied his handsome face…long eyelashes, strong jaw line, sensuous lips.

Chocolate eyes opened to her, "Good Morning" he answered gruffly.

"Morning"

His finger came to brush a lock of hair behind her ear, "You look beautiful"

Rolling her eyes, "I'm sure I do not, but thank you anyway"

That made him let out a small chuckle. Before she could respond Kristina was heard at the door.

"Mo-m, why do you have your door locked?" she yelled, "I'm hungry!"

Alexis gasped and squeezed her eyes closed shut pulling the covers over her head.

Patrick couldn't held but laugh as he pulled it over his head too, "Do you think if we hide under here she'll go away"

Her eyes narrowed at him, "." she said swatting his chest.

"Okay it's not funny" he responded dimples etched in cheeks.

Damn dimples messed her up every time, "Kristina go turn on the Disney channel and I will be right out" she yelled.

"Fine!"

Crawling off the bed she pulled the sheet tightly around herself and went into the bathroom. Patrick pulled his clothes off the floor, dressed and sat on the bed rubbing out the knots in his neck.

The cold water splashed her face and she looked into the mirror, the dark circles under her eyes, the lines. She shrugged it off and dabbed on some makeup. There was a nervousness in seeing him…it was silly really but he had needed her last night, but this morning it may not be the same.

Walking out slowly she caught his eye and he gave her a sad smile, "Are you okay?" she wondered aloud.

"Better now" he said touching her hands.

She let out the breath she was holding in, "Come on, I have a hungry child and Davis women are not very nice when they are hungry" she teased.

Following her, "And what do Davis women eat for breakfast, popcorn"

"Oh the joker…we eat corn pops"

Molly came out of her bedroom and met them in the hallway, "MOMMY!" she greeted all smiles.

Patrick knelt down to her, "Hi Molly"

"Hi" she responded brightly before running into the living room.

Turning to her, "She's chipper in the morning"

"I'd say she got that from her father…but well…you've met Ric"

He laughed as they followed Molly. Kristina was watching the television as they walked in, "Alright ladies, Corn Pops or Frosted Flakes?" she asked.

Kristina turned slowly and eyed Patrick, "Did you spend the night" she questioned.

"Um"

"Kristina Adella Corinthos-Davis"

"What?"

Patrick interrupted, "I'll let you ladies talk…Molly you want to help me make some French toast?"

Molly nodded furiously, "FRENCHIE TOAST!"

After they walked out Alexis sat in front of Kristina, "Patrick is my friend"

"Like Kate was Daddy's friend?"

"Yeah sort of…but Patrick's not going to move in here...and I really want you to get to know him and try to like him okay?"

She seemed to contemplate it for a couple moments, "Okay Mama"

"Thank you" she said before kissing her head, "Now he does make French toast which means he can't be that bad, right?"

"Right" Kristina answered giggling.

Patrick stood at the stove flipping the pieces of egg covered bread while Alexis sipped on a cup of coffee and the girls sat at the table eating. Kristina was laughing with Molly as she drenched hers in maple syrup.

Alexis sighed watching them so carefree for the moment, "She hasn't asked about Michael yet…but she will, and she adores him…I don't know what to say" she whispered.

He looked to her pain alive in his eyes, "I'm sorry I…"

"Don't…you did your best…this isn't your fault" she said her hand coming to his back her head resting against his upper arm, "So you didn't tell me you can cook"

Dimples etched in his face, "I can't…I can make French toast…that is about the extent of my culinary knowledge" he said flipping a slice on her plate.

Biting into it, "Well you can make this all the time because it's heavenly"

"Thank you" he said leaning in to kiss the corner of her mouth.

The front door opened and closed and Alexis assumed Viola would be rounding the corner…but she wasn't alone. Sonny was there, obviously freshly shaved, and showered, but his eyes still vacant.

"Daddy!" Kristina yelled syrup still stuck to her lips.

"Hey Princess" he said unable to take his eyes off of Alexis and Patrick.

_**Did you ever have to make up your mind?**_

_**Pick up on one and leave the other behind**_

Alexis pulled her lip in between her teeth, "Sonny" she whispered gently.

He turned away harshly back to their little girl, "I can't stay…I just wanted to come see my Princess" he said kissing her atop her head.

"Aww Daddy, you can't stay" she pouted jutting her bottom lip out.

Shaking his head, "No, but soon, k? I love Daddy/Daughter day"

"Okay daddy" she said slightly dejected, "I love you too"

She willed her mouth to open…to say something…anything…but she stood there as he nodded and turned to go.

"Are you…" Patrick started.

"I'll be right back" she said before going after him.

_**It's not often easy and not often kind**_

_**Did you ever have to make up your mind?**_

Her legs moved quickly under her as she raced to get to him before her left. Sprinting she made it to the car door before he had a chance to climb in.

"Sonny" she said stopping him.

Turning around, "Yeah"

"You didn't have to run out of there"

"I have to go see Michael"

"Sonny" she pleaded.

His eyes looked to her a torrent of emotions swimming around in the shades of browns and blacks, "I just…I thought it could help if I saw you…and Kristina…I didn't…just never mind, alright? Just I'm glad Patrick is fine after what happened to Michael"

That pissed her off, "Don't…don't act like no one else can feel pain but you, okay? Patrick was a mess last night…I was too so don't…just don't try to make me feel guilty when I did nothing wrong"

Their gazes matched and then he looked to his shoes, "I'm sorry" he admitted his voice choked in his throat, "I just"

_**Did you ever have to finally decide?**_

_**Say yes to one and let the other one ride**_

Her hand touched his face gently, "I know…and if you need anything…anything…you know I'm here"

Arms snaked around her body and he laid his head on her shoulder, "Thank you"

They stayed for a couple long moments until he pulled away matching tears in their eyes. Neither spoke but he offered a sad twitch of his lips masqueraded as a smile.

**There's so many changes and tears you must hide**

_**Did you ever have to finally decide?**_

_(Did You Ever Have To Decide – Lovin' Spoonful)_

Walking back into the house she turned around once more to look at the car pull down the drive…and then she walked in to Patrick giving Molly a piggy back ride as Kristina led him around the living room…and she felt something on the inside pulling her in a million different directions at once.


	10. Happy

**September **

It was comfortable, the routine they fell into, only really speaking when she dropped Kristina off or he picked her up. It made things easier for her relationship with Patrick it had also made her heart heavy. It should have been so much work, getting their friendship back…but with them nothing was ever easy and every time she looked into those brown eyes it made her remember why she fell in love with him.

_I never thought that I  
Could ever find someone  
Just having you around  
Is so much fun  
You're right here by my side  
Just like I knew you would  
And it feels so good_

Baby 'cause you make me happyAs much as she still got butterflies in Sonny's presence it didn't take away from what she felt about Patrick. He had come into her life when she least expected it; at the tail end of another bad boy destined to break her heart. There were a lot of things that made her resist him…her past, his age, their differing personalities…but in the end that seemed to work for them. He was so easy…he never hid his feelings; instead he seemed to want to talk it out when there was any problems. He calmed her, his warm dimpled smile, skilled hands,; he had brought a peace to her life…and her girls, they had fallen for him as hard as their mama.

"Wake up gorgeous" he whispered warm breath tickling her ear.

"Go away" she muttered pulling the covers over her head.

His cold hand slipped under the cover a finger running along her side, "Come on we promised the girls"

One eye opened, "Oh no bucko, _you_ promised"

"Come on Coney Island, can't you smell the popcorn?" he asked going under the covers and curling next to her.

"Unfair" tactics she mumbled as their bodies melded together.

"MAMA! PATTY!" made her sigh, "Hurry up, we don't have all day!" Kristina yelled pounding on the door.

Her feet slid out from under the warmth of the covers, "Go entertain them while I get ready" she said going into the bathroom.

Peaking her head out, "So is this a jeans type activity?"

"Wear the True Religion ones" he said grinning.

In response she tossed a dish towel at him.

_Oh, daddy used to tell me  
All I had to do  
Was think for myself  
And tell the truth  
You know how much I love you  
How much you mean to me  
We were meant to be, oh  
Baby 'cause you make me happy, yeah_

He loved her. He couldn't say when it happened but somewhere between wanting her legs wrapped around his waist and wanting to wake up next to her every morning he had a thud moment. She had resisted at first, pushed him away but there was something about the challenge that made him pursue her even harder. It was more then that because once he got to know her she revealed so many more facets of herself. She wasn't merely a brilliant, hard assed attorney or even a doting mother. Now he couldn't imagine his life without her…or the girls. He liked making them French toast in the morning and teaching them to race a car around a track. Giving up his bachelor pad hadn't even been as hard as he had once anticipated.

"Patty Cakes!" Molly hollered jumping on him.

Scooping her up he lifted her above his head, "Miss Molly Molls" he greeted.

"Did you wake Mommy up?" Kristina asked hands sitting on her hips.

Putting Molly down he mimicked her pose, "Yes ma'am" he said saluting her.

That made her bust in a fit of giggles and he sat on the couch, "Alright serious time…which one of you is winning me a stuffed animal today?"

"That's your job!" Kristina cried incredulously.

Molly crawled onto his lap, "I want a stuffed animal" she told him.

_Baby you make me happy  
The way you make me smile  
Can't you see I'm yearning for you_

_(Make Me Happy – Christina Aguilera)_

Alexis walked out smiling at the sight…her girls and a man who made her smile…it felt like almost being complete.

**November **

Sonny followed the pathway through the grove of pine trees to the clearing. His hand quickly swept the pine needles off the slab of stone.

_Baby Girl McCall_

"I'm sorry I haven't visited" he started before rambling a bit. He stopped when he heard a sniffle behind him.

Sam stood there with a bouquet of pink roses gently wiping tears from her face, "Sonny"

"I'm sorry" he apologized getting up.

She shook her head, "I didn't…don't be"

His arms came around her softly his chin resting atop her dark hair, "I'm so sorry I left you to deal with it alone, I'm so sorry I acted like she never meant anything to me" he said feeling tears burn his eyes.

As she pulled away she looked into his eyes, "It's never too late to make things right"

**February **

"Happy Birthday Dear Spencer, Happy Birthday to You!" everyone sang in harmony.

The dark haired boy blew out his candles and then stuck his hand into the cake. Alexis looked across the room to where Patrick cradled Catelyn as she cooed and gurgled in his arms. Watching him took her breath away and scared her at the same time.

They had one discussion on children…one where she thought they were on the same page…watching him with Catelyn made her start to have serious misgivings.

Behind her she heard Spencer yell, "Hi, UNCLE SONNY!"

Turning to Nikolas with a furrowed brow he shrugged, "Sonny came and expressed interest in getting to know his nephew along with the twins. Robin and I decided that it would benefit everyone.

Watching Sonny handed the boy a package and watched him open it excitedly before throwing his arms around Sonny's neck. The sight of it alone made her dimples etch in her cheeks.

"Mama, Mama, can we spend the night?" Kristina asked.

Robin smiled, "Spencer wants a sleepover, Cameron and Jake are already staying and we would love it if the girls could too"

Shrugging, "It's fine with me, well if I can tear Patrick away from your child" she said dryly.

To that she turned around and stared at him, "Wow"

"Yeah"

OoO

To say that seeing them together hurt was an understatement. It was how he knew she must have felt a lifetime ago. To see another person make her smile, touch her intimately, kiss her lips. She was happy and he had no right to ruin that.

OoO

"You look exhausted" he said wrapping his arms around her on the ride to the docks.

Her body tensed to his touch, "A little"

There was silence as they made their way to the car and back to the lake house. Once inside she went to the room and cleaned off her makeup and got dressed for bed. When she came out he was sitting on the bed, "What's the matter?" he asked.

"Nothing" she said trying to shrug it off.

His hand touched hers and he pulled her to him. She had a hard time letting her eyes meet his, "Come on Lex, something is wrong" he asked.

Finally she sucked in a breath, "Patrick, are you okay with the fact that you may never have your own child"

"What? Where is this coming from?" he asked.

Looking at him, "Today you and Catelyn, Patrick you barely let that girl out of your sight…she looked like you were made to hold a baby…and I don't plan on having any more children"

He looked away staring at the wall for a couple long moments, "I never thought about being someone's father, I haven't ever desired children…until I was with you. I am so happy with the life I have with you and the girls. If that is everything I get, I am okay with that"

"But?"

"But" he said looking at her intently, "I would love to have a child with you"


	11. Us Again

**A/N: I make a little jump into the future; I hope you don't mind.**

**Also some things might seem OOC for Alexis but from my experience what goes on in this chapter makes a person act OOC. **

**Six Months Later**

"Physically you both are fine" is how Dr. Lee started, "But since it's not coming naturally, you may want to start looking into other methods"

The unfamiliar smell of failure clouded the room. It felt like sinking; watching the world around you slowly slip away.

Patrick put his hand on her shoulder, "Thanks Kelly" he said to his colleague before she offered a smile and walked out.

Crouching down to where she sat on the table he looked her in the eyes, "Are you okay? We don't have to do this. I told you I love the life we have"

His words were the right ones and a part of her believed he meant them…but the other part of her couldn't erase the memory of his face when he told her that he wanted to have a child with her.

"I'm fine; we knew this was a distinct possibility" she said the words coming out technical and robotic.

It was a realistic view; that's what she always leaned on…and yet the truth was she couldn't completely wrap her head around the fairness of it all. Three times…three times she had become pregnant on accident…a fluke. Now that it was something wanted, prepared for, longed for even it was something she couldn't accomplish. She had no control over the situation and it frustrated her.

The beep beep of his pager interrupted them and he sighed, "That's my surgery"

"Go ahead"

Leaning down he kissed her, "I'll see you at home"

"Okay, see you then"

After he walked out she slowly pulled her clothes back on under the hospital gown and fought back the bitter tears that stung her eyes.

Walking out she ran into a smiling Robin pushing the double stroller. One look at the babies made her feel like she had been kicked in the gut, "Alexis" she greeted warmly

"Hey" she mumbled hoping to sound less pained then she felt.

"You okay?"

"Yeah fine, a headache, check up" she lied.

"Oh"

"Maybe next week we can do lunch…catch up" she added hoping to sound happier then she felt.

Puzzled Robin nodded, "Okay…if you're sure" fell on deaf ears.

OoO

Wiping the leftover tears she checked her makeup in the car mirror and reapplied blush were the tears had stolen it. Then she painted a smile on her face and made the trek up through the lake house door.

When she came in she was worried about the quiet and found her way back to the playroom. Cracking the door the room was dark except for the glow of the television. The sight alone was enough to make warm fresh tears puddle in her eyes the emotion of the day overwhelming her.

Sonny sat on the couch; Molly sleeping on his lap, Kristina curled to his side.

"What are you guys doing?" she wondered aloud.

Kristina turned to her and hissed, "Shhhhhh!"

Smiling Sonny gently lay Molly down and walked over her in the hallway, "We're watching West Side Story"

"Isn't that a little old for her?" she asked.

Hearing her Kristina turned, "No, it's not! Last year we read Romeo and Juliet and this is basically a modern re-telling of the same sort of story. Plus mama it's so romantic. They were so different and they fell in love anyway"

Dimples ablaze Sony looked to her as she rolled her eyes, "When did she become such a smart" and then whispered, "Ass"

He shrugged, "Want some coffee"

"No thanks Daddy!" Kristina answered.

Shaking his head he closed the door, "And you? I know you want some coffee" he teased.

"Does that come with an IV?"

Usually she would gripe with him about making himself so at home in her kitchen but she was too tired so she let him open cupboards and violate her espresso machine.

When he stopped she looked up, "What?"

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Come on counselor I've been banging your cabinets for five minutes and you haven't said anything. No smart ass remark, no kicking me out of your house…what's up?"

If he hadn't known her so well she would have thought to lie but it didn't make sense to anymore especially not when a fat tear rolled down her cheek, "I want a baby and I can't have one"

All she remembers next is the flood gates bursting open and him holding her up as she sobbed. When she finally pulled away she sniffled, "I'm sorry I'm such a mess"

"Don't be sorry"

His words were so gentle it made her want to wrap herself in them, "It's always you; the one who is there to hold me up when the world is crashing down on me"

The words spoken made them both stop and stare at each other. Sonny had resolved once that if she was happy, really happy he would let her be. Even if it was someone else who made her that way. He wondered if this was the opening to something; a crack in her resolve.

Then she spoke, "I'm sorry I shouldn't be talking to you about this…it's not fair to Patrick"

There were two choices…and the Sonny Corinthos he once knew would have went with the one that helped him to get what he wanted. Instead he went down the road less traveled, "The Lex I know let's nothing stop her from what she wants…and if this is what you want; you'll get it. I believe in your"

Her eyes shined at him and she shook her head, "You know if you're every looking for a side job, I think barista or bartender may be your calling" she teased as she touched the cup to her lips.

_**Three Months Later**_

"Last shot" Patrick said as she bent over in front of him.

"This cycle"

After he slowly rubbed the skin around it and blew, "Did it sting?"

"I can't even feel it anymore"

Pulling her close to him his mouth gently touched the soft skin of her collarbone, "Not tonight, can we just do it" she asked.

Her words cut him; she could see it as he pulled away, "What?"

"I didn't mean…I'm just tired"

Frustration marred the four walls of their bedroom and he rubbed his hands through his hair, "I don't want a baby" he said.

"WHAT?"

"Not like this. We can't even make love and have it not be about the baby"

"What do you expect Patrick; every time I have to pee on a stick I know that I am going to let you down"

"You're not letting me down"

"Oh I'm not; of course I am Patrick"

"Stop telling me how I feel"

"Why wouldn't you feel that way? You are stuck with a woman with three kids, one who is your age, but I can't even get my dried old uterus for on last hooray"

"Alexis"

"I know Elizabeth can have kids, what about Leyla; I'm sure she has a working uterus for you to use" she spat.

Words came from nowhere and by the end of her rant she was exhausted her body trembling. He stood at the door, "What do you want from me Alexis?"

"I don't know" she admitted tearfully unable to control the mood swings her body was dealing.

Coming to her slowly he sat on the bed and she fell into his arms as his lips touched her head, "Let's just be us again, okay? We can figure it all out later"


	12. Snowflakes are Falling

**A/N: Honestly I had a hard time with this chapter…but this is the story the muse wants to tell…I hope you stick with me. **

She couldn't help as the smile began to upturn her lips. Months and months of trying had left scars on her heart. Slowly they were being filled up by two tiny pink limes. Hiding the smile that graced her face she opened the bathroom door where Sam waited.

"So?" she asked nervously chewing on her bottom lip.

Alexis let out a breath, "Well, I want to know how you feel about having a new brother or sister"

"AH!" the younger woman screamed before wrapping her arms around her.

This was what dreams were made of…her oldest daughter celebrating her youngest child growing inside of her. It was poetic in ways and it felt almost complete…she couldn't wait to tell the girls…but mostly she couldn't wait to tell him.

OoO

"Leaving so soon big brother?" Matt asked arching his eyebrow as Patrick turned in his charts.

He flashed the dimples, "Got my girls to get home to"

Matt nodded, "Such a family man" he lamented.

"Just wait little brother, wait until you meet a woman who throws that whole player schpeil right off track" he told him.

Nadine looked up, "I told him the same thing…one day he's going to find some filly to settle down with and those stallion ways are going to go the way of the pasture" she told them.

Patrick smiled, "Aunt Raylene was a wise woman" he told her.

"Yes she was"

Rolling his eyes Matt sighed, "I don't know which of you is nuttier" he said dryly.

"Matthew Hunter, you are going to hurt my feelings" Nadine said pouting.

Sighing, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings"

As Patrick walked away neither noticed…Matt would find a woman that made him want to settle down…or maybe he already had.

OoO

"Thank you for taking the girls. I can't wait to see his face. Alright, be careful in the snow, okay love you too" Alexis aid before hanging up the phone.

Walking to the window she saw light flurries starting to come down. Going to the couch she decided to lie down. The always being tired had been the first indicator that anything was up. Touching her belly she smiled, "Your daddy is going to be so excited" she said before pulling the afghan over her body.

OoO

The snow had begun to fall gently covering the road with a thin sheet of ice. For a moment he contemplated pulling over and getting his chains out…it just seemed more trouble then it was worth. The roads were familiar and he rounded the curves slowly. The ice was so smooth he didn't feel out of control until mid curve when the tail kept sliding straight, "Shit" he muttered trying gently to turn the wheel. When nothing happened he began to panic thrusting his gear into neutral and pumping the breaks. It was futile and as the car went over the side he felt his heart stop and everything went black.

OoO

When she woke it was dark and she checked her phone for messages. Nothing, so she walked to the window and saw that the outside was blanketed in white snow…picking up the phone she dialed his cell and when it went to voicemail she left a message, "Patrick it's Alexis, I'm guess you are stuck at the hospital; it is really coming down out there; so keep safe."

Walking towards the kitchen she threw a bag of popcorn in the microwave and listened to it pop.

OoO

"Incoming head trauma, male in his early thirties, went off the embankment over on Route 9" Cassius yelled before the elevator burst open.

Matt was already on his way when Nadine turned away from the patient, "Matt don't" she said her hands on his chest pushing him away.

Looking at her like she was crazy he pushed back, "Tell me what we go-…" he started before he got a glimpse of who was on the stretcher.

OoO

The popcorn had just started to pop when the phone began to vibrate on the counter, "Hello"

"Miss Davis?" a familiar voice asked

"This is she"

There was a short pause, "Miss Davis, this is Nadine…Nurse Crowell over at General Hospital…there's been an accident ma'am"

OoO

"Pa…Patrick" he sputtered out before Epiphany pulled him away.

"OR 3" she told the men before turning to Matt, "You're off this case, and don't argue with me Dr. Hunter" she said before stalking off after them.

Standing his feet felt glued to the floor and Nadine grabbed his hand, "It's going to be alright" she whispered on deaf ears.

Standing stoically he stared at the Nurse's station, "He's my brother…and I never…I never told him"

"He knows Matt" she told him and hoped he believed it.

OoO

"Goddamn it Nikolas answer" she cried before throwing the phone back on the table. Nadine's words echoed over and over in her head and she could feel her heart start to speed up. Closing her eyes she tried to calm but it was almost impossible. Grabbing her coat and keys she ran out the door. It took entirely too long to drive across the city to General Hospital and as she finally burst through the doors Matt sat huddled in the corner, Nadine on the ground with him, Epiphany greeted her, "Miss Davis"

_While I was watching you did a slow dissolve  
While I was watching you did a slow dissolve  
While I was watching you did a slow dissolve_

"Where is he, is he alright, when can I see him"

"Miss Davis, I am going to have to ask you sit down"

_Did I imagine or do the walls have eyes  
Did I imagine they held us hypnotized  
Did I imagine or do the walls have eyes_

Robin walked out in scrubs and as soon as she made eye contact with the young woman she knew the news wasn't good, "No" she said shaking her head and feeling the pain run cold through her blood stream.

"He suffered extensive head trauma…they are working on him, but, they aren't sure" she said tearfully.

_Life in slow motion somehow it don't feel real  
Life in slow motion somehow it don't feel real  
Life in slow motion somehow it don't feel real_

It was like someone had taken her from floating in the air to being drug under water...further and further and every time she thought she was hitting the ground she would just fall more. Touching her stomach she thought about the life that grew inside of her…the life that needed their father. Walking towards the wall she rested her forehead against the cool tile and she felt the warm tears make tracks down her cheeks.

OoO

The hours seem to tick by but time seemed to blur together…Nikolas had shown up sometime in the midst of it all, but everything seemed so vague and jumbled in her mind.

"Alexis" someone called and her eyes came up to meet his.

He was kneeling down in front of her in an instant, "Robin called me, I came as soon as I could, are you okay?" Sonny asked his chocolate eyes filled with worry for her.

Shaking her head she watched as he opened his arms for her and she fell into them, "I can't do this Sonny, not again…please not again" she said the sobs wracking her body as he held her.

_Snowflakes are falling I'll catch them in my hands  
Snowflakes are falling I'll catch them in my hands  
Snowflakes are falling now you're my long lost friend_

_(Slow Motion – David Gray)_

If there would have been words to make her feel better he would have said anything…but there weren't, not this time. Not in the same hospital, on the same floor waiting to see if she would have to bury one more person she loved. So all he does is hold her and hope that everything will be okay.


	13. Alone

**A/N: Thanks for reading even if I have made you totally sad, lol. **

She tried not to look at her watch, to think about each minute they were in there with him because every minute made her feel like he was never going to smile at her again, and that wasn't acceptable. Sonny sits next to her, his hand entwined with hers. She knows that he is trying to silently reassure her but he can't really say anything because they both knew this usually didn't end well. After the doors to the OR's swung open for the fifth time with no sign of Robin she got up, "What's taking them so long, I am going to find someone and get some answers" she ranted.

His hands touched her arms and held her still, "Lex…you need to sit down, okay…Robin will tells us as soon as she knows something"

Pulling away from him she walked over to the window staring into the black abyss. This wasn't how things were suppose to be. The waiting is the worst, the helplessness she feels every time she sees another surgeon make their way out of the rooms…it's like every moment he is in there makes her lose another bit of faith. It serves her right…thinking she could be truly happy.

When the doors open Robin pulls off her mask and in those brown eyes are all the answers she needs. The cry comes out almost guttural and her knees buckle under her but she doesn't hit the ground as Sonny's arms wrapped around her and cushion the fall. Robin leans down to place a hand on her arm, "There was extensive damage…he is alive, but they don't know...they don't think he is going to wake up" she said her voice trembling in her throat.

Closing her eyes she wishes she could wake up from this nightmare, that when she opened her eyes he would be next to her, they would be having their baby and everything would be okay again. Pulling herself together she looks at the young woman, "Can I see him?"

Robin nods, "They are in post op but they are preparing a room for him"  
Nodding she sucked in a deep breath, "I am going to go call Sam; I will be back" she said hoping the steel resolve would not crack before she walked out of the waiting room.

"Lex" Sonny called.

Turning, "I need to talk to the girls" she said with an air of finality.

OoO

"Do you need anything, I can come down" Sam asked tearfully over the phone.

Leaning against the cold wall she ran her hands through her hair, "Can you keep the girls for a couple of days"

"Of course"

Nodding she swipes the stray tears, "I just don't want to have to explain to them"

"Mom"

When she hears the word she realizes how bad it is…Mom is only a word used when something is on fire, exploding or when someone is dying.

"I love you" she finishes.

It's almost her undoing and she can feel the bile rise in her throat, "I love you too" Sam she manages to choke out before hanging up the plastic phone.

Walking towards the bathroom she locks the stall and empties her stomach before she sinks to the ground letting the tears pour down her face once again. She knows she has to be strong, for Patrick, the girls, this baby but right know all she really wants to do is let it all out.

OoO

She follows Robin down the long hallway to the room and when she swings the door open she has to fight a new batch of tears that puddle in her eyes. His thick hair is gone, replaced by bandages, his skin is ashen and laden with bruises. Sitting next to him she stares at him for a couple long moments before gently taking his hand in hers, "Hey you" she says before biting her lips to keep from crying, "You have to wake up, okay? I know what the doctors say but they don't know how stubborn you are…or I am, so you have to wake up okay…we're so close to getting everything we wanted" she finishes before bringing his fingertips to her lips.

OoO

Watching her is like sinking into hell and after a moment he has to turn away. It's not fair for her to have to face it again and if he could; he would do anything to make Patrick wake up if it meant seeing those dimples again.

Robin sat in on of the plastic chairs her head in her hands. As he comes close she looks up at him, "I just don't want to believe he will never wake up again…how could this happen Sonny?"

He thinks back to the shot of red hair lying in a bed and shakes his head, "It happens to the wrong people…Patrick was a good guy, he has his whole life ahead of him…just like Michael"

Her arms wrap around him and he leans his chin on her head. The world isn't fair if a guy like him gets to live and men like Patrick and children like his son are confined to a hospital bed for the rest of their life.

OoO

"Hey, you need anything?" Robin asks hours later at the door to the hospital room.

All she has done for hours is watch the hospital monitor, pray, curse God. Now looking at the doctor she nods, "I actually need a favor"

"Anything"

"I'm pregnant, or at least that is what the home pregnancy test said…but I need confirmation, can you give me a blood test" she asks wanting to get it over with.

Robin nods, "I can take your blood right here so you don't have to leave"

"Thank you"

OoO

After the blood is drawn she manages to lay back on the chair someone conjured up for her and she barely hears the footsteps at the door. Opening her eyes she sees eyes that remind her so much of ones they say he will never see again, "Matthew?"

"Hi Miss Davis"

"Alexis, remember?"

He shuffles a bit, "Yeah, Alexis, sorry, listen I was just"

"Come in, I need to stretch my legs anyway…sit with your brother"

All he does is nod and when he walks by her she places a hand on his arm, "He loved you very much" she whispers hoping it gives some sort of reassurance.

Walking out she can hear him start to talk but it doesn't feel right to listen. Sonny is still sitting in the waiting room and as their eyes meet he opens his arms for her to fall into, "Oh Sonny" is all she manages to get out before the sobs return.

Robin finds them sitting together silently and when Alexis looks she knows. Nodding in question she waits for Robin's smile and nod. Her hand comes to her stomach…this time was supposed to be different…this time she wasn't suppose to be alone.


	14. Come Back to Me

**A/N: There are only 3 more chapters left in this, eek! **

**When I started this fic, I had no ending, instead I decided to leave it up to the muse to decide. Well, she finally has and I look forward to wrapping up this story with you all.**

**Thank you for the kind words/reviews. **

_**There's a ship out  
On the ocean  
At the mercy of the sea  
It's been tossed about  
Lost and broken  
Wandering aimlessly**_

Gently she touched the stubble of his face around the bandages and tubes. His jaw was bruised down the left side, the stitches holding together the part of his beautiful face that had been marred by the glass. It was one of the hardest things she had ever faced…watching him lie in that bed, so still, almost like he was in a peaceful sleep…but it wasn't some sleep…the doctors had told her he would never wake up. She hadn't accepted it. Sure she nodded, and signed every paper like everything was okay. Part of her was mad at him…for putting her in charge of any medical decisions, for leaving her to have this baby all by herself…and for making her love him so damn much. That was only the smallest part of her, the rest ached, sat by his bedside, said more Hail Mary's in one night then she had practically her whole night, begged him to wake up, and cried when the brain monitor beeped the same beep over and over.

_**And God somehow  
You know that ship is me  
'Cause there's a lighthouse  
In the harbour  
Shining faithfully  
Pouring its light out  
Across the water  
For this sinking soul to see  
That someone out there  
Still believes in me**_

His arm was stiff to her touch but she bent it at the elbow and brought it to her flat stomach, "You have a reason to come back…and not just me, or the girls, or even Matt and your father, you have this baby to come back to…the baby we wanted" she begged tears falling like rain from her eyes and dying on her lips.

_**On a prayer, in a song  
I hear your voice and  
It keeps me hanging on  
Raining down  
Against the wind  
I'm reaching out till  
We reach the circle's end  
When you come  
Back to me again**_

She could still taste his kiss some nights where she would wake up in the bed and reach for him and instead find herself clutching the cold pillowcase. Sonny had made it a habit to spend the night on her living room couch. After the first couple of times she stopped fighting him about it…because the truth was as much as she hated needed anyone, she needed him…to remind her to smile with the girls, to eat her vegetables for the baby and to not feel like the noose was simply slipping tighter and tighter around her neck.

Five months into her pregnancy and her belly was starting to round slightly, "I have a doctor's appointment today…and ultrasound, I'm going to hang the picture of our strong healthy baby right next to your head…just as a reminder for when I'm not here, okay" she told him before placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

Walking out she pinched her eyes shut before the fat tears had a chance to reveal the extent of her broken heart. As she climbed off the elevator towards Dr. Lee's office she found him sitting there, coat draped over arm, his curls combed back and a nervous frown on his face.

"Sonny, what are you doing here?" she asked.

Looking up he gave her a small sad smile and stepped off the chair and towards her, "I told you that I'm with you every step of the way" he said as a mixture of a promise and a warning.

Nodding she let a small smile, "Thank you Sonny"

OoO

_**There's a moment  
We all come to  
In our own time and  
Our own space  
Where all that we've done  
We can undo  
If our heart's  
In the right place**_

Dr. Lee always looked at her with a mixture of sadness of compassion. It was hard being around anyone in the hospital really because everyone knew Patrick, and everyone had cared about him. She was glad he had so many people there to visit. It's the reason she had refused to move him from General Hospital. Sure a big part of it was that she wasn't just accepting that he was never going to wake up…but another part wanted him to be there…somewhere she knew he loved, with people who loved him. Being a Cassadine, it wasn't hard to convince the board…especially with Nikolas championing her cause every step the way.

Sonny sat silent next to her watching as Kelly squeezed the jelly on her barely forming bump, "Well, there is your baby" she said smile.

There was something about looking on the screen, to see the strong heart beat of their child that gave her another surge of hope, "My baby" she said her voice getting caught in her throat.

She always forgot how much he knew her, and it seemed that every time she truly needed him he sensed it and was there to offer whatever he could. Today, his hand found hers holding it tight…and she realized how good they were at being each others strength.

_**On a prayer, in a song  
I hear your voice and  
It keeps me hanging on  
Raining down  
Against the wind  
I'm reaching out till  
We reach the circle's end  
When you come  
Back to me again**_

Moving the paddle around Kelly took them through each part of the little growing person and Alexis marveled at it all…the tiny toes, fingers, but it all came back to the little heart.

"Would you like to know the sex?" Kelly asked.

Looking to Sonny he smiled supportively, "Yes" she said nodding.

For a minute she moved the device on her stomach and then smiled, "Well Mommy, meet your son" she told her.

_**And again I see  
My yesterday's in front of me  
Unfolding like a mystery  
You're changing all that is  
And used to be**_

The emotion released like an overflowing dam, and her whole body shook with a sad and happy sob. His hand tightened in hers and he brings his body close to hers and leans in to her ear, "Your son is beautiful and strong…just like his mom"

Strong and beautiful…she wishes she could believe it…because right now all she feels weak and broken.

After she steps out of the room and he is there with a dozen roses, "You didn't have to do that" is her response.

He shrugs, "Thank you for letting me share that with you today"

Before she can think she is wrapping her arms around him and letting his hug envelope her, "Thank you Sonny…for everything" she murmured her head on his shoulder.

When they pulled apart she smiled at him, "I'll see you later?" she asked hopeful.

His dimples etched into his cheeks, "If I didn't know better I would think you like me sleeping on your couch counselor" he teased.

Shrugging she rubbed her stomach, "More like the little soccer player likes Uncle Sonny's dinner much better then Kelly's…although don't tell Mike" she added walking down the hallway.

OoO

Coming into his room she felt her heart flutter, "Hey" she whispered approaching his bed.

Pulling out the black and white fuzzy picture she places it on the end table propping it up against a vase of flowers. Taking his hand she gently entwines their fingers remembering the feeling of his soft nimble fingers on her skin.

_**On a prayer, in a song  
I hear your voice and  
It keeps me hanging on  
Raining down  
Against the wind  
I'm reaching out till  
We reach the circle's end  
When you come  
Back to me again**_

"That, is your son Patrick…he's strong and healthy…you should see the way his little heart beats, a champion just like his daddy….but he needs you to wake up, okay? I know what these doctors say, but they don't know you like I know you…so you need to wake up for me, okay? Take your time, but I'm not giving up on you and either is your son" she finished before laying her head on the bed next to his.

_**When you come  
Back to me again**_

_**(When You Come Back to Me Again – Garth Brooks)**_

Lightly brushing her lips against his cheek she smiled sadly wishing she could be looking into those chocolate brown eyes, "I never said it enough…but I love you Patrick"


	15. Take The Pain Away

**A/N: Buckle your seatbelts…the road to the finish line is a rocky one. Hope you like!**

Spring had come and gone, leaving with it one burgeoning belly, and a bevy of broken hearts. She tried not to think about it all the time…she knew it wasn't good for the baby to feel the constant dull ache that throbbed in each part of her body. So she did her best to spend as much time as she could with her girls because it was the one time she could honestly feel like there was happiness again.

Sonny was another part of what had helped her get through the day by day. It seemed normal for her to lean on him again like she once had. She hated having to do that, to lean on everyone, but losing what Patrick had given her left her for a loss.

From the moment he walked into her well ordered life he had changed her. She was once cautious but he had taught her that not everyone breaks your heart in the end…he had shown her how to enjoy life, to be a bit more carefree, to stop being so damn afraid.

Now, she was afraid all the time…afraid every time her girls walked out the door or Sam told her she was on a PI job. Most of all she was afraid the strong boy that grew inside of her would never know his father, and that she would never stare into those chocolate eyes and feel safe again.

OoO

Most days she did well, crying in the bathroom with the water running so the girl's couldn't hear her, eating enough for the boy that grew in her stomach, and smiling at all the right points in the day. If he didn't know her so well he would say she was adjusting well.

She wasn't and it was killing him slowly. He ached to be enough, to be able to take that beautiful heart and piece it back together. He wasn't. So, all those numbers he had from neurologists that had consulted on Michael's case he called again. He did all this unbeknownst to Alexis because he loved her enough to want to put that smile back on her face…even if he wasn't the one to put it there.

If he was the man a couple years ago, he would be too wrapped up in his own wants and needs to do this. He wasn't that man anymore; she had always had a way of doing that to him…to make him feel like he could be someone better then who he was.

OoO

"You do realize that breaking and entering is against the law right?" she asked coming through the kitchen.

Her stomach had rounded out, her skin glowed but her eyes were tired.

"I have a great lawyer" he teased.

Rolling her eyes she plopped down on the chair and rubbed her stomach, "Well, since we are starving, I won't press charges" she told him before closing her eyes and rolling her neck.

He knew she wasn't sleeping the way she should. When he stayed the nights on the couch he would hear her pacing through the hallway to the kitchen for glasses of water, "Why don't you go lay down while I finish dinner" he said trying to sound nonchalant.

When she looked at him her eyes were narrowed but her shoulders sagged and she sighed, "I'm too tired to even argue" she said walking towards the back of the house.

From the kitchen he could hear he say something to the girls before he voice floated down the hallway. When dinner was finished he walked to her room. She lie on the bed her chest rising and falling with each steady breath. He couldn't find it in him to wake her up so he closed the door and fed the girls.

After was bath time, one story each and then their prayers, "And watch over Lucky bear, and Mr. Snowy Rabbit" she finished.

Kristina was next, "Please God watch over my mommy, my daddy, my sisters, my little brother and God, please bring Patrick back home so my mommy can stop being sad" she finished.

Tears stung his eyes as he cleared his throat, "Alright guys, lights out" he said hoping they didn't sense the emotion in his voice.

"I love you Daddy" Kristina said as he tucked her in.

"I love you too Princess"

Coming to the kitchen he put away the extra food and loaded the dishwasher. The whole situation made him want to laugh in irony…he had been one of the most feared men on the Eastern Seaboard…but his greatest joy came from tucking his kids into bed and doing the dishes.

Before he went home he walked to her bedroom and watched her sleep. Her eyes fluttered open and met his, "What time is it?" she asked.

"Late, the girls are asleep"

Nodding she closed her eyes again. He turned to leave but her voice stopped him, "I don't know what I would do without you Sonny"

If it was up to him; she would never have to know.

OoO

The first months of her pregnancy the hospital smell had made her nauseous but these days she had grown accustomed to it. She tried to make her visits when she wasn't interrupting anyone. Matt visited early mornings, Noah visited late at night, Robin and Liz mid afternoon…and her as soon as she left the office in the evening.

Coming in she brushed the dark hair away from his face, "Hello gorgeous" she whispered sadly.

Rubbing her belly she sat down beside him and just talked; it was all she knew how to do anymore…talk like he was there with those dimples flashing.

Taking his hand she brought it to her stomach where the baby kicked softly, "Look, he's kicking for his daddy" she said wistfully.

Before she left a doctor walked in, "Hello" she greeted.

He smiled, "I don't think we've met, I'm Dr. Gallagher" he told her.

Nice to meet you she said shaking his hand, "Are you new here at General Hospital?" she asked.

His eyebrows knitted, "Um, no, actually Mr. Corinthos hired me to consult on Dr. Drake's case, I was actually looking for him"

The words swirled in her brain and she could feel her blood begin to boil in her veins, "Oh…right" she said feigning knowledge, "He isn't here, but I will definitely tell him you stopped by" she told him.

Her car tore at the asphalt under her tires as she raced across town. She was livid. How dare he hire someone without even consulting her.

Walking through the door she found him sitting at the desk, "Hey what are you…"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" she seethed.

Confusion marred his face, "What are you?" he asked getting up.

Tears stung her eyes and she tapped her foot, "You hired someone to look into Patrick's case without telling me…who gave you that right?" she yelled.

Rubbing his chin he looked at her, "I was trying to help"

"By keeping this from me..he' the father of my child…and you did this without even wondering how I felt about it" she told him starting to tremble.

"I didn't want to get your hopes up"

A sob choked in her throat at the realization of what he wasn't saying, "What did they say Sonny"

When he didn't answer her voice rose, "What did they say?"

Reaching out he touched her arms, "Lex, they"

"No, no, no" she cried crumpling into his arms.

Almost in slow motion they came to the ground; her sobs soaking his shirt. Pulling away their eyes met, and his thumbs slowly swiped at the falling tears, "Sonny"

If he looked back on that moment he couldn't explain how it happened…how his lips came to hers softly at first kissing away the tears, or how it turned into more; their mouths crashing and suckling. He just wanted to take her pain away.

OoO

"Wait, did you see that" Dr. Gallagher asked Robin Scorpio.

She looked at the brain machine that had been steadily beeping for months and then she noticed it, the slight blip every seven beeps. Running into the room she saw the fingers move and she covered her mouth.

"Move you damn fingers Patrick" he yelled hoping his brain would finally cooperate, "Move them, move them, move them damn it"


	16. Loving Two

**A/N: You all are fabulous, thank you for sticking with me. I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

All he had wanted to do was make her stop hurting…and as much as he wanted her back in his bed and in his life…he didn't want it like this, with another mans child growing inside of her, with tracks of tears on her face, trembling with an ache he couldn't heal…but then she looked at him, all that pain marring her beautiful face and he knew he would never deny her anything. So when shaking fingers came to buttons on his silk shirt he didn't stop her and when she found her voice and whispered, "Please…make it stop hurting" he knew that he would walk through the fire if she needed him too.

OoO

For a moment she just wanted not to feel the slow crushing of her lungs under her chest…to stop the desperation she felt every second of every day; intensified every time their son kicked, or when she laid her head next to the empty pillow at night. When her mouth crashed upon Sonny's she felt like she was stealing his air and beginning to be able to breathe again.

OoO

"Finally" he yelled in his own head, "Three fingers down, seven more to go…come on asshole, do you never want to see another chick naked again? Do you want these cocky doctors being right…that you can't come back? Do you want to never watch a race car again…do you want your son to have to sit in here every week and talk to you like this? No, well then fight damn it, fight" he screamed.

OoO

After he lies next to him silently and he doesn't want to say anything; doesn't want to remind her that when they walk out of that door, the world waiting to crash over them again. Her caramel colored hair splays out against his chest and he lets his fingers entwine in the strands as he just tries to live in the moment…even if his heart wants this to be more than a moment.

OoO

When she's with him, lying in his arms, listening to his heart beat…it's like the pain doesn't feel like too much to bear. He always had this way of smoothing that sharp pieces of herself that cut like knives at her insides. They didn't need promises between them; of what happens when the world implodes around them…but she knew for this moment…she was safe from it all.

OoO

Robin ran towards her office and grabbed her cell phone, "Pick up, pick up, pick up" she mumbled before the voicemail picked up, "Alexis…this is Robin; I need you to call me, it's important" she said before clicking it shut and running back downstairs.

OoO

Her phone beeped and she pulled the sheet up to her neck while she searched for her clothing. Sonny pulled on his pants and got her stuff together. Looking at her phone her eyebrows knitted, "Robin called" she said before dialing her voicemail.

After the message she dialed Robin's number, "Robin, I got you message…what? No, wait…I…wait, what?" I will be right there" she says before clicking he phone.

There are a million different emotions running through her and her hand comes over her stomach and she is scared to believe.

OoO

He watches as her face changes with each emotion and he waits until she is off the phone when their eyes meet and she gasps for breath before looking up at him, "They…think he's waking up…I have to get to the hospital…I have to get to the hospital" she finishes her voice breaking as she pulls on a shoe and then starts to tremble, "Damn it, where is my other shoe" she cries.

His arms come around her and she pulls away, "He's waking up, he's waking up" she repeats tears streaming down he face.

OoO

The trek over to the hospital seems endless and she knows she should say something to Sonny…but she can't…not right now, right now is strictly hoping that God still hears some of her prayers. All that matters right now is him, and every thing else…like what happened between her and Sonny; that can wait to be figured out later.

OoO

Part of him wants to know what she is thinking and the other doesn't want to think of her regretting the moment they shared. They are both silent until the limo pulled up the hospital and she let a sort of whimper out. His hand rubbed her back gently and she turned to him, "Thank you" is all she murmurs before climbing out of the limo. He doesn't know whether he should follow…so instead, he has Max drive towards the lake house.

OoO

Robin met her at the nurse's desk, "What happened…tell me everything" she asked.

They walked towards the elevator, "We were standing there, and Dr. Gallagher began to notice his brain activity start to increase…and then he moved his fingers…I know it doesn't sound big, but…"

Tears fell from her eyes and she felt her child flutter inside of her, "He…moved….his fingers" she said smiling.

When they came into his room she sat by his bedside. This was the man she loved…the man she had made a life with, the one she wanted a future with. Taking his hand into hers she brought it to her lips, "You come back to us Patrick"

OoO

He hears her voice and it only strengthens his resolve that he has something to come back for…too much to spend the rest of his life lying in a hospital bed.

"Open your eyes…open your eyes and look at the rest of your life" he repeats over and over.

OoO

"DADDDDDY!" Kristina screams running and jumping into his arms.

Molly is fast behind her, "UNCLE TUNNY!" she cries as he picks her up too.

These girls…and his sons; they are what makes life worth living and he can't imagine a day going by when he doesn't remind himself to cherish everything he does have; instead of mourning what he doesn't.

OoO

She sits for a long time, simply staring at him…hoping, praying, and trying to not think about anyone else. She never thought it was possible; to love two men with everything she had…but she did. Sonny was a part of her soul; he was he one who knew who she was without ever asking. It was the strongest, deepest thing she had ever felt...and it was a love that came close to destroying her.

With Patrick, the love was different…he loved her so purely and gave her all the stuff she never knew she needed or wanted. He had made her happier then she had been for a long time…and she couldn't imagine her life without him.

When chocolate colored eyes fluttered open her breath caught in her throat, "Patrick" she managed to say.

A small dimple curved into his pale left cheek and he opened his mouth but she touched her fingertips to his lips, "Don't…Shhhh" she said just wanting to stare at him.

Tomorrow…tomorrow she would think…but tonight all she wanted to do was breathe him in.


	17. End of the Road

**A/N: I promised when I started this that I would let my muse just go with the ending she wanted. I have…and this is the end. **

**Thank you all for reading and for your wonderful reviews.**

Rounding the corner he stopped just outside the door and looked in…a sad smile came to his face at the sight, and his gaze fell down to his Armani shoes. She wasn't his anymore.

_"Hey" he said as soon as she walked through the door.__  
__She looked exhausted, "Thank you for staying with the girls" she answered brusquely. _

_  
__His hands naturally reached out to touch her arms and she pulled away, "Sonny"_

_  
__Tears came to her eyes and she looked away, "I can't do this with you…right now" she said turning around._

_  
__He stood there looking at her. That afternoon he had felt so close to her, but right now it was like there was an ocean in between them, "Alexis"__  
__When she turned back to them he could see where the tears had made tracks on her cheeks, "I love him Sonny…I really, really do…and then I look at you, and we share something…we always did, didn't we?" _

_  
__It was a question that didn't need a response and he simply let his left dimple cave into his cheek wistfully. He had wasted so much time trying to denying what they had; not coming to his senses until it was too late…he had destroyed all the faith she had in him._

_  
__Her shoulders sagged and this time she didn't stop him from bringing his arms around her and pulling her against his chest. His hand stroked the caramel strands of her hair as he murmured nonsensical words to try and make this better. _

_  
__"I'm sorry Sonny" is the last thing she said that night._

_  
_Patrick's hand touched the soft brown hair that covered his son's head. Then he looked down at Alexis; her eyes closed and peaceful. If someone would have told him that coming to Port Charles would change his life forever; he would have laughed…but it had in so many ways. This was the place where he had met his brother, reunited his father, fell in love…and had a son that owned him in ways he didn't know another human could.

Toffee eyes opened, "He's beautiful" she whispered hoarsely.  
Water filled his eyes and his hand brushed the hair off her forehead, "Perfect" he told her before bringing his lips to her forehead.  
Together they gazed at their baby…both realizing how close to came to losing everything.

_"What's the matter?" he asked_

_  
__Bobbie had just left after signing his release papers and Alexis looked like she was going to throw up, "It's not Jeff Gordon, is it?" he asked referring to the baby. _

_  
__When she didn't remind him that she wasn't naming her baby after someone who ran into walls for a living he grew concerned, "Seriously…talk to me" he coaxed. _

_  
__Her eyes darkened as she looked at him, "When you were in the coma…. I…" she got out her voice stuck in her throat. _

_  
__"I know how hard it was for you" _

_  
__Shaking her head she bit her lip, "I thought you were gone forever…and I was so hurt, and I felt so alone…I slept with Sonny"_

This was it…her world, the rest of her life. Sam, Kristina, Molly, and Mattheson Davis Drake.

He was unexpected, much like Patrick had been. In a sad way, before him, she had become resigned to spend her days alone…but there he was with his chocolate brown eyes and devastating dimples just waiting to love her.

She had loved before him; one great, tumultuous, beautiful, crazy love…a love that had changed her, broke her, healed her. After Sonny she never thought she would meet someone she wanted to spend forever with…but she had. It didn't mean she didn't love Sonny, but she had something with Patrick she didn't want to give up.

"_Are you in love with him?" he asked his lip trembling._

_Running her hands through her hair she tried to formulize a response to his question. Loving Sonny wasn't something she thought about…it was as natural as breathing. _

"_Patrick I…" she started._

_His face seemed to contort in pain; "It's a simple yes or no question" he spat. _

_Tension crackled in the air, and she knew that his anger was justified…and a defense mechanism, "I will always love Sonny"_

Instead of anger, she watched pain mask his face, as he stayed silent. Closing her eyes for a moment she looked up at him, "But I am in love with you"

"So you named your kid after me" Matt asked the cocky voice not masking the goofy smile on his face.

Patrick grinned, "My mom, but if it makes you feel better than yes" he teased.

Kristina sat at the edge of the bed, "Patty, are you coming home with Mattheson?" she asked concerned.

Looking over his eyes found Alexis' and he smiled, "Yep, I'm coming home…so you better start practicing on your race track," he told her.

Hearing that made her heart swell. They had been taking things slowly…building that trust back, letting him heal, and giving her some space to make sure this was what she wanted.

It was. He was, their family was what she wanted, and she had it back.

OoO

"Bye, bye Mama" Molly said kissing her lips after Kristina had climbed of the bed.

Sam held her little brother in her arms with tears in her eyes, "He's beautiful" she marveled.

Smiling she looked at them all, "All my children are beautiful," she told them.

Patrick stood at the entrance of the door, "I hate to break up the party," he said looking at his watch.

After the groaning and more goodbyes, Molly threw herself in his arms, "Patty, I want you to tuck me in" she asked sticking her bottom lip out.

He shot a look at Alexis, "Why don't I take you home with Sam, read you a bedtime story, if that sounds okay with your mom"

Nodding, "Yeah, go ahead, I'm not going anywhere" she said smiling.

As the girls went out with Sam he came to her kneeling at her side, "You have given me everything…and I want to give you that back" he murmured.

Touching his face she looked into his eyes, "You loving me…it does"

OoO

The room was empty when he peaked in and her eyes fluttered open to meet his. She smiled one of those sad smiles he was tired of putting on her face, "Hey" she said hoarsely.

"I was just checking up on you, if you're tired…I could go"

She shook her head, "No come in"

Walking in slowly he paused at the tiny form in the blue blanket, "He's beautiful"

"Thank you"

Coming to her side he looked at her closely. He had loved her for a long time…longer than he ever would admit to. There was a string of women after her…replacements…almost good enough…but in the end it had always come back to her. Part of him had always hated her finding someone else…but he had never really let himself believe she would be with someone else forever.

Now, she was. He had waited too damn long to pull his head out of his ass, and another man was making her dreams come true.

"How you feeling?"

"Besides the fact that I just pushed an eight pound baby out…good" she teased.

Everything was always so easy with them, and he wondered if it always would be…or if loving her from the outside looking in would be anything less than painful.

However he knew…even if this was all he would ever have…having her in his life would be enough.

OoO

For so long she had loved him…waited for him…secretly wished that they could find some way…but he lived on, moved on…and she was forced to do the same.

"Thank you for coming" she told him reaching out her hand.

His fit in hers perfectly and he smiled, "You can't get rid of me that easy" he joked.

Looking at all she had…she wouldn't have changed their journey even if it did end here.

Her life was with her children…with the man who made her believe in love again…but a part of her would always belong to Sonny Corinthos.

OoO

Sometimes happy endings are found in the detours and the roads less traveled…and sometimes they are found in the stops along the way that make the journey all the worthwhile.

Fin 


End file.
